


Prices We Pay: Interlude

by Jox22



Series: Prices We Pay [1]
Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Difficult Decisions, F/M, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Introspection, Post-Season/Series 03, Pre-Season/Series 04, Religion, Travel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-12
Updated: 2021-01-12
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:55:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 37,422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28035024
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jox22/pseuds/Jox22
Summary: Chloe, leaves L.A. with the girls after the big revelation.To much is going on in her life that she doesn't understand.she just needs time and space, to figure it out.And maybe a helpful priest will have the answers she needs.
Relationships: Chloe Decker/Lucifer Morningstar
Series: Prices We Pay [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2053560
Comments: 33
Kudos: 37





	1. Shock

**Author's Note:**

> So as there is a bit that eludes to a previous story, I guess the main thing you would need to know, is there is a new character, not the main focus here. She is with Chloe due to a magical nature, mild, and supernatural events that surround her appearance, simple. more on this at the end. 
> 
> Also all chapters are done, all that remains is editing. I will tentatively shoot for a weekly update and at most monthly, though i don't think it will get to that point.

  
Chloe was still crying when she walked through the front door. ‘Not the best idea in retrospect but you try having your whole world upended and see how you do!’ 

Trixie and Alex had jumped up from the kitchen table, abandoning whatever art project they were working on to say hello, only to slow as they got a look at her.

The babysitter closed her laptop, putting it on the coffee table as she rose from the couch. “Ms. Decker are you alright?” 

Chloe wiped her eyes furiously and tossed her bag on the kitchen island, it thumped heavily. “Yes. Thank you, Taylor.” The young woman raised her eyebrows at the snappish tone.

Chloe buried her face in her hands and ruthlessly suppressed the scream threatening to come out. She took a few deep breaths and when she felt able raised her head. “I'm sorry Taylor. It's just been a hard day. Look, I'm in for the rest of the day, ‘and foreseeable future’ so you can head out early.” 

Trixie had moved closer but was holding onto the end of the island, nervously biting her lower lip. Alex had moved up just behind her and had reached out to hold onto her hand in comfort. 

Taylor moved closer, running her hand through Alex's hair and squeezing Trixie's shoulder; she gave Chloe a once over. “I still have time, why don't I take the girls out to the park for a bit, you know get them out of your hair? Give you some space?” 

“No!” Chloe cringed and turned to the counter, clenching her nails into the stool. She did not need to snap at the innocent babysitter. “No, thank you. I need to talk to the girls anyway.” 

Chloe reached for her bag looking for the discarded phone. “In fact I'm going to send you the payment for the month.” She forced a smile over at the confused young woman. “I know I had you scheduled, but after everything, I think we need some time, just us.” The young woman had been a godsend, open availability, since the whole cock-up with Marcus, Pierce, fucking Cain, but Chloe needed her gone.

Taylor nodded slowly, in the way you do to people that can't be reasoned with. “Ms. Decker I really appreciate the offer but I can't take full pay. Just the time I’ve used ok.” She rushed on to avoid the, you must, no I couldn't, hot potato. “Look just save it, maybe use it on the girls, for me. They're so easy it’s practically duck soup. I’ve gotten so much work done for school, I'm ahead.” 

Chloe debated briefly but she could use the savings. “Alright, but thank you, really Taylor. I know this past week has been crazy, I’ve really appreciated you being here.” 

“Yeah no problem Ms. Decker. Ok, well I'll just get my things, but you know if you need me, anything changes, just call ok.'' As Taylor parked up her coursework, the girls migrated over to say goodbye. Chloe hopped into one of the barstools and closed her eyes for a moment, she jolted when Taylor went by and laid a hand on her shoulder in goodbye. 

For a long moment the girls and Chloe just looked at each other. Trixie leaned over the back of the sofa, her arms hanging. She had a concerned pinched look to her that Chloe could never stand for long. Alex was scrunched down her hands and chin pressed into the cushion, she shot confused looks between her and Trixie. 

“What's wrong mommy.” Trixie finally asked. 

Everything, everything is wrong. “Nothing baby. I’m just feeling a little bad.” Understatement of the year. Chloe took a deep breath, this past week had been like something out of a nightmare. A friend was dead, her ex was nothing but grief and anger, and once again she was the center of an investigation. This on top of a whole new reality. Nothing in her life was what she thought it was. Lucifer was the actual Devil. The last thought had her cringing; she didn't understand anything anymore. “You know I had to go to work today, to talk about everything?” 

Trixie nodded. “Yeah, cause Mr. Marcus, he killed Charlotte and tried to hurt you and Lu...was doing other bad things…” Trixie grimaced at the partial slip up, Lucifer was a forbidden word lately. 

Chloe ignored the slip and hopped off the stool to move to the couch. She settled into the free space and pulled Trixie over so she settled against the arm of the sofa but her legs were over Chloe's lap. Alex shuffled over on her knees but stopped just short of cuddling into Chloe's side. 

“That's right Trix. I spoke to the investigators who are working the case and gave them all the information they need, they won't need my help for now.” Chloe squeezed Trixie’s knees. 

“You don't hafta go to work no more?” Alex was brave enough to ask but as Chloe turned to her she ducked her head and her hands jumped up to fiddle nervously with Trixie's untied laces. 

Chloe gave her a soft smile but did not reach out as she normally would. She was now aware that Alex was _other_ , not that she understood any of it; she had been frustrated at Lucifer for bringing her into his delusions and had forbidden him to bring it up again, so she had no idea who or what Alex was. It was confusing and maybe a little unsettling and the little girl was picking up on it. 

Everything about Alex said child, little, vulnerable. She didn't have any solid memories before she had been found and according to her medical records she was either a late five or early six. She had gone through a full work up including x rays and dental check up but a lack of records, malnutrition and seemingly lack of previous care playing a factor, it was hard to determine her age. 

Chloe reached out pushing her dark honey blond hair behind an ear. Alex’s eyes flicked up and Chloe caught the surprise and caution in the dark blue gaze. Chloe smiled over it, she had been distant this past week due to the revelation and it was not helping the timid girl. 

“No, I don't have to work baby.'' Chloe let her hand fall back to Trixie and didn't miss the way Alex had swayed just slightly to follow it. “I was thinking. A lot of changes have happened recently and I know I need a break, so what do you think about a vacation?” 

“Just us? No work? You promise?” Trixie was skeptical, work always interfered. 

“Yes Monkey, just us.” Trixie squealed and wiggled until she was in Chloe's lap properly and wrapping her arms around her neck. She was going to be ten soon, Chloe squeezed her tight, she would miss this. 

Trixie pulled away, already excited even without the details. She pulled Alex along to plan what they would take with them and didn't see the worried look on Alex’s face but Chloe did. 

Alex had heard Chloe's confirmation better than the older girl had. 

~~~~~

Chloe spent the rest of the day planning their departure and fielding Trixie's suggestions for destinations, slightly regretting giving her the choice to choose when she suggested backpacking through Panama. 

Alex had picked back up in the wake of Trixie's excitement but she shot Chloe tentative looks every so often. She had always been perceptive; she could tell something was bothering Chloe and it had to do with her, so she was quieter in an attempt to not draw attention. 

Chloe tries not to think about the otherness. She tries to smile, to laugh, a touch on the arm, hand on the head, poke in the belly for being silly. She tries to be normal for the little girl but she is colossally aware that normal is no longer an option. 

When she pulls out the suitcases and begins packing it ignites a countdown she wasn't aware of, It sets her nerves on edge. This week of procedure and questions has kept her in a fog of normalcy but the fog is dissipating fast, she's not sure what it will revel once it clears, all she knows, feels, is the need to get away. 

She packs more than enough, using the two biggest bags for her and Trixie and hesitantly the small travel case for Alex. When Trixie asks why they don't get a bigger bag for Alex she sweats through an explanation that Alex doesn't have as many things, plus their out of suitcases, It's the truth but she breathes easier when Trixie shrugs moving on to stuff an extra pair of sandals in her bag and a sweeter or two Chloe insists on. 

When the girls are asleep Chloe unpacks Alex’s things, then in a manic state searches the entire house for any and all of her possessions. She spreads the items out over her bed. trying to find answers in tiny shirts and shoes. 

It's a sad collection, a mixture of second hand clothes, sent in a trash bag courtesy of the group placement when Alex was dropped off and a few good items Chloe was using the stipend to slowly replace. The toys were minimal, not for lack of trying, Alex got overwhelmed when presented with items, not understanding that she could have anything, but she did have a few coveted items. 

Chloe traces the dips and edges of a honeycomb pattern sweater much like Alex does when she’s anxious. It’s an adult sized sweater in blue, prussian blue. Alex is never far from it, the only reason Chloe has it now is because she insisted on cleaning the house and doing all laundry before leaving. The damn thing is a pain to take care of some type of high end Egyptian cotton, and worth more than reasonable, but Alex loves it. 

The other is a stuffy about eight inches tall round in shape and squishy soft, the thing is bright red overall except for a small circle of black on the belly and two black devil horns two small red devil wings sit as arms and a devil tail finish it off. 

Trixie had spotted it first and thought it was the funniest thing ever; she had snapped a shot after borrowing the phone and proceeded to text madly with a cackle reserved for Maze, before abandoning it on a shelf. Alex had wandered over and poked it until it was upright. Something about the silly toy with the big eyes and tiny vampire mouth had put the brightest smile on the reserved little girl's face, it was the only thing she had ever asked for.

Chloe’s hands are shaking when she packs the travel bag again. Not everything fits this time around, she unpacks, re-folds and packs again, rearranges and folds again, until all of Alex's belongings fit into the small suitcase and one backpack. She folds the sweater into this and puts the devil on top before zipping it closed. She moves the two bags to the front door with the others and stands back. 

When they leave the house tomorrow any traces the little girl existed will be gone. Chloe takes a step back then another until she stumbles up the stains on shaky legs, she wills herself to sleep and does not think how easily a life can disappear into two bags. 

~~~~~

Chloe's up the next day at dawn. She's in and out of the shower quickly lest she get caught thinking. She gets both girls up and into the shower as well and double checks she has all the documents they will need. 

She's spoken to her mother and Dan about her plans, mostly, and reminds them that her phone will be off for the most part, to save on roaming is her convenient excuse, she promises to email and check in often. 

She takes the last of the perishable food that won't survive their absence out to the trash and also puts the suitcases into the trunk of her car. She debates briefly but adds Alex's case as well rather than leaving it in the front seat.

As she french braids Alex's hair she manages to do so without overthinking at least until the girl turns on the stool and hugs her as a thank you. Chloe can't return the hug, not right away and by the time she moves Alex has picked up on her hesitation. Alex pulls back, her hands clasping together and twisting. Her face falls in confusion, she doesn't understand what she is doing wrong. Trixie comes out of her room declaring her turn before Chloe can find something to say, she lets herself be distracted. 

“Mom what's for breakfast.” Trixie jumps from her stool once Chloe finishes her hair, she swings open the fridge and stares into it for a few minutes despite the emptiness, another victim of the fridge light. 

“Since we don't have groceries, how about we go get breakfast!” Chloe doesn't want to be in the house any longer than needed. Cleaning and packing yesterday had been cathartic but now she's done and feeling very trapped, very aware that just anyone can come calling. “We have a few hours before we have to get to the airport to get the tickets.” Chloe reaches and smooths back Alex's flyaway hairs and puts as much enthusiasm into the idea as she can. 

Alex searches her face. “I..yeah?...Trixie do you want breakfast?” She defaults to Trixie under presser. She hasn't done anything wrong, she thinks she hasn't but Chloe is different and she doesn't know how to fix it. 

“Yes! Can we get pancakes?'' Trixie deadlifts herself up on the counter and just hangs, kid reasons, she does it with a grin.

Chloe smiles she has to, she wants to. “Of course anything you want today.” She ushers the girls out the door and into the car. They don't need to be monitored or buckled in but Chole does it anyway. She doesn't look back as they drive away. 

She stops at a mostly empty diner and lets the girls sit at the counter alone. Alex thinks it's very grown up, Trixie plays it cool taking charge of the menus. She sits at a booth across from them and lets them order whatever they want, having no energy to argue over healthy meal choices, Trixie ends up encouraging Alex to get eggs as well as french toast and she thinks fruit is in the orders somewhere and that's good enough. 

Chole manages only coffee. She wastes the morning away staring at the tablet and avoiding the waitress that comes over far too often with sympathetic eyes once she spots the bruise on Chloe’s chest. She refuses to button the shirt up, at least not after it’s been seen. 

It’s been a week and it still aches, or more accurately stabs, burns, constricts. She was lucky not to have cracked anything, they told her. Lucky to only have restricted mobility, due to the sore muscles, for the time being as it heals. Maybe she likes seeing it. Everything that's happened to her, the worse things, don't leave marks, she's always felt cheated by it somehow. Her fathers death left her torn, her chest felt open and raw, something that should have been seen. But all anyone saw were her breasts. So yes, she likes seeing it, it's a physical proof that she needs right now. 

She gives up on actually purchasing the flight tickets when the girls get loud enough to let her know she's sat there too long. Resigned that she can't waste further time, she cleans up the girl's mess a bit. She did her stint as a struggling waitress and knows it's a pain when parents let the kids trash the place. When she's paying at the check out the same waitress is there and hands her a card and a crumpled pamphlet with her change. 

“Bright days are ahead. The Lord will give you strength.” She says lofty. 

Anger flares bright and hot, it still her breath and makes her dizzy. The clueless waitress quakes at her dark glower, sputtering out apologies but Chole has turned away by then, pulling the girls away from the claw machine and out the door. 

The girls are quiet in the back seat as she struggles for some type of control. Chloe has not been this angry since her father had died. The hapless waitress had stumbled in on good intentions and shaken the ruthless control she was holding onto. And apparently the universe has a sense of humor.

The pamphlet is horrifyingly laughable, Chloe can only imagine the fever in which it must have been written.

**What The Devil Doesn’t Want You To Know**

_So, what you need right now is some practical, focused information about three things:_

_1\. The strategies the devil uses to defeat you._

_2\. Why all of this is important._

_3\. Take Action. Here’s How To Arm Yourself._

There's much more but she crumples it further without bothering. She may want answers but she knows they won't be found here. 

The business card is simple, white, printed vertically rather than the normal horizontal. A cross done in two simple brush strokes but done in blood red, lest anyone forget the suffering of the Lord. 

Holy Church of GOD  
+  
Domestic violence organization   
Resource center for women and children

Numbers, addresses, and emails are helpfully listed and then on the back small but still legible: 

_The road of faith passes_  
_through darkness and doubt,_  
_and is nourished by_  
_patience and perseverance._  
_Submit yourselves, then, to God._

_Do not fall sway_  
_to the Evil One._  
_He has nothing to do with the truth,_  
_there is no truth in him,_  
_for he is a Liar and_  
_The Father of Lies._

_He is but a fallen Angel_  
_whose heart has been burned to ashes_  
_and can not comprehend love_  
_so then temps and commands Evil_

_Do not fear the Devil_

_God is faithful, and he will not let you_  
_be tempted beyond your ability,_  
_but with the temptation he will_  
_also provide the way of escape,_  
_that you may be able to endure it._

  
Chloe gets lost tracing the lines. It reads like fanatic ideologue, but something about it draws her in, she can't decide how she feels about it but there's a pressure in her chest. 

“Mom?” Trixie's voice is tentative from the back seat but it’s enough to snap Choles spiral. She jerks and starts the car with apologies and excuses to roll over the worry. As she pulls out of the lot the crumpled pamphlet is tossed out the window and the crushed business card that was to follow is spared and shoved into a pocket.

The radio is up and the windows down with the girls singing in the back for lack of anything else to do. Chloe has headed to the airport a number of times only to change course. She's wasting gas and needs to make a decision. She's just getting her bearings and has talked herself into a somewhat calm reasoning toward a decision, when Alex's shouts from the back seat.

“Lucifer!” Happy and full of relief just like every time she sees him.

The car jerks wildly, horns are blaring and Chloe's cursing with her heart in her throat as the girls scream in terror in the back. She doges a near fender bender, barely, and waves the car forward on the right before easing over to the next available spot to park. 

Choles eyes sweep around the car a few times before focusing on the girls.

“Are you hurt?” She eyes them both, crying a little shaky but fine.

“Alex. did you see Lucifer?” She tries to keep her voice even but something like paranoia darkens her words. 

Alex's tries to speak but the words get caught in her throat, a hand fists around the seatbelt and the other points out the window. The confession comes out watery. “I...I...his building, I can see it.” 

When Chloe looks, the building is there peeking over roofs a few miles off. She's on a bit of a rise; it's the only reason they can see it. 

She's too far away to actually see anything. Whether the lights are on or not, or if anyone's home. It’s too early in the day for the club to be open. Is it even a club, maybe it's a cover for something sinister. How could she know, maybe he's in there now with Maze and whoever else knows. 

All at once Chloe is done. Alex whispers an apology from the back but Chloe is not paying attention. She thinks fast and when the traffic allows she pulls back into the flow.

She’s made a decision and has a stop to make before the airport. It’s time to leave L.A. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so, fun story. This was a bigger piece of work, started after season 2 and abandoned by mid season 3. As I was a sounding board for the story, it was given to me. I've picked with it here and there but didn't do a lot on it, but with the new material to work with I've had two scenes that I thought would work as one-shots. As I wrote them out I thought maybe I can hook them together, easy right. Then I ended up with this 12 chapter monstrosity. I don't know if I'll do more on it but you never know.


	2. Anger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chloe stops on her way out of town for a quick chat with Linda.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, here we go. I was able to get most of the editing done so I should be able to post twice a week.
> 
> ....there's an odd gap where I didn't intend for it to be... my OCD dislikes this......

Despite her earlier conviction Chloe hesitates as she parks in front of the Spanish Colonial. There's no car in the driveway. She's not sure if she’s even home but she can see a lit chandler through a window. She pulls back her shoulders and gets out of the car. 

Chloe rounds to the passenger door near the curb. Her voice is steady, a bit surprising as her gut is turning somersaults. “Alex, come on out.” 

When Trixie moves to slide out and follow, Chloe leans in and holds her back with a hand on her knee. “Monkey, I need you to stay in the car.” Her little girl has always been observant, so it shouldn't be all that surprising when Trixie’s confusion falls in a horrifying moment of understanding, her eyes following Chloe as she grabs Alex's backpack. 

“Stay in this car until I get back.” Chloe means to be stern but her voice cracks. She shuts the door firmly before Trixie can ask questions and is glad for the child lock as Trixie tries the handle. Chloe takes Alex's slack hand in her own and guides her up the walk even as Trixie’s voice finally surfaces with a plaintive “Mom?” behind her. 

Chloe takes the step up the small porch and knocks quickly, she feels just a bit detached, despite the decision she's come to. Her heart is in her ears, time seems to stretch out and she does another quick series of knocks to speed it up. 

Linda’s cradling coffee when she pulls open the door she's in a skirt and tank top with frog slippers, not quite ready to head out for the day. 

“Chloe! Alex! Good morning. What do I own for this early visit.” Whatever goodwill she had wrestled from the morning with her coffee mate fades. Alex is standing limp and shocked next to Chloe who looks as if she's been through the ringer. The bags under her eyes just about match the bruise on her chest. Worse is the look on her face, betrayal. 

“How long have you known?” Chloe manages to keep the snap out of the question but just barely. 

Linda gives a confused chuckle and begins to question her, but the dark look in her friends eyes stops her. 

Things have been crazy since Charlotte. Lucifer had called a few days ago to cancel another appointment. She had argued with him, as it was just after Charlotte's service. She had spotted him far off in the cemetery as it had concluded. She had only spoken to him once, again over the phone, just after him and Chloe were ambushed and she was worried about him.   
  
Obviously Lucifer held back a few details. 

“Halloween, year before.” The information seems to hit, flaming the fire in the other woman's eyes. “Chloe why don't we step inside.'' Linda tries to smile and indicates Alex who is still mute and does not need to be a part of that conversation but this only seems to agitate Chloe further. 

“How, how could you not say anything. I had a right to know.....All this time, you've known?” Chloe feels stripped. 

Linda nods in that non committal way as she abandons the coffee cup in the planter next to her door. “It was not my secret to tell, Chloe.” She slips into a soothing tone and steps over the threshold. “Please come in and we can talk. There are some things I can't tell you, patient confidentiality. but...” Linda's shoulders snap back as Chloe lets out a scoffing manic laugh that she barely manages to choke back before it dissolves into a sob. 

The backpack Chloe had over her shoulder slides to her feet. “I think this _situation_ would override confidentiality!” Chloe rips the button down away from her chest. “And this? did you know about Mar..Cain too?” At Lind’s wince Chloe can’t keep the tears back. 

“Has this all been some plan or game...have I been some kind of project to Luc..” Linda steps forward in concern but Chole steps back pulling Alex with her. The girl stumbles but doesn't protest. Alex hasn't moved or said anything since Linda had opened her door. Alex has stood limply in Chloe’s grip without protest. Linda looks to the discarded backpack and further out to the car, she can see Trixie is in tears pressed to the window. Alexs has that horrible shell shocked look of children in trauma. 

“Chloe please, let me help you.” Linda presses her hands to her chest to keep from reaching out again and startling Chloe further. “This is a big shock, believe me I understand. But you are not in danger. Lucifer has told you the truth. And I know...” 

“Bullshit!” Chloe's pace is aborted as Alex stumbles on the first step off the landing. The girl latches onto the banister in reflex, acting like a small tether as Chole takes short steps back and forth in the confined space. 

“Bullshit, he told me the truth. He's been lying this whole time about everything. it's all tru..” Chloe bites the words off she's been choking on them too long. The truth she thought she understood has crumbled in one fell swoop. “Maze? Amenadiel?...A..” Chloe chokes off with a pained sound and looks down to Alex. The girl senses it and finally reacts, hunching under the gaze. 

Lucifer had taken Alex’s case and twisted the facts, looping the little girl into his delusions, or so she had assumed at the time. He had used his favors left and right, intent to keep an eye on her. When his application for temporary placement had been denied, he had pulled Chloe right along, suggesting Alex stay with her. As Alex was a victim of child trafficking and the abductor had attempted to get to her in the temporary placement and was still on the loose Chloe had taken her in under police protection. 

These last few months had been hard, Marcus pulling her one way, Lucifer either pulling or pushing her the other. Then Alex, a second child, that alone is not an easy task to take on. 

Her and Lucifer had been off-step for a while. His spiral with the Sinnerman only making it worse and finally, finally, they had begun to get something like their old rhythm back while working on the case for Alex. 

And all of it meant nothing, it had all been a lie. 

“I don't know what to trust. I don't know what's safe.” Chloe admitted plaintively. 

Linda has moved forward enough to cup Alex's shoulder. She pulls her forward in small increments but Chloe’s grip on her small hand doesn't loosen. “I understand Chloe and I am so sorry you are hurting. Thank you for coming to me.'' Linda moves slowly, keeping a low tone as she watches Chole but the woman's gaze is locked on the little girl. Utterly devastated and torn. 

“You did the right thing, I'll take Alex, give you some time to think.'' 

Alex is just a little girl, she may not have started that way but that's what she is now. Lucifer had wanted her close to keep an eye on her, not trusting it was not another manipulation but now she's just another sorta member of the gang. Linda knows all this but Chloe doesn't. 

As Linda gently tugs on Alex's wrist to pull their hands apart the little girl finally reacts. A whimper pulls from her chest, her other hand releases the banister to cover her mouth, as if ashamed of the sound. Chloe's anger and confusion crumbles and she lifts Alex into her arms with a pained grunt backing away from Linda.

“No Linda. I'm not...I didn't mean...you can't.” Chloe fumbles, she's not this person she doesn't want to be. 

“Alex can’t stay for a visit, we're going away for a trip. Alex Trixie and me.'' Alex is clinging to Chloe silently, her tears barely moving her small chest as Chloe struggles to save the situation. She had fully and knowingly intended to drop the girl off like an unwanted puppy, simply because she was afraid of what she didn't understand. 

“Chloe you don't have to do this, you're frightened and upset, for valid reasons. Leave Alex here with me. I am happy to watch her. You don't have to make any rash decisions.” 

Chloe shakes her head and moves out of Linda's reach. Alex had flinched away as Linda had tried to rub her back. Clinging to Chloe desperately. 

Linda was just advised by Maze that she was going to bed with enough sedatives to keep her out for a few hours but she wonders if she should go in and try to get her up anyway. If this ruckus hasn't got her attention then she's probably out.

Chloe's eyes follow Linda's back into the house, she backs away further taking in the other woman's concern. “I was just. You can't have her..I made a mistake. Alex belongs with us.” Chloe bites her lip at that admission but Linda doesn't call her out, she knew just as well as Chloe who us meant. 

“I would never hurt her.” She vows. Linda's right Chloe is frightened, confused and feels wholly betrayed by it all. She had thought of getting away, just to breathe and think and feel like she and her daughter were safe but what she had just done was wrong. 

Chloe closes her eyes and holds on. “She's just a child?” 

Linda's hands fold under her chin. “Yes, Chloe. There's more, when you're ready but that's what matters.” 

Chloe nods a bit frantically. “Then we're leaving. Please give me her bag.” She hitches Alex into a better position and holds out a hand. “I need time away. We do. Please.” 

Linda holds the bag hostage. “Chloe, I trust you, I do, and I understand that you need time.'' Linda slowly holds out the bag but doesn’t release it, shooting another concerned look at the small girl. “I want you to promise to call me, please. At least once a day. Even if it's just to say goodnight or talk about the weather.” 

Linda releases the bag and clasps Chloe’s hand, she squeezes briefly and lets go. “You're not alone Chloe. Please, you're my friend. I'm here to talk at whatever pace you need.” 

Chloe’s so very tired. The anger has retreated and all she is now, is numb. She's been on her own before but has never felt as alone as she feels now. She wants to be petty and tell Linda to fuck off, because how can she claim friendship and ask for trust when she's been keeping secrets with the Devil but Chloe doesn't even know what that means. So she backs away slowly but manages enough courage to offer a truce for now. 

“We’re going to London, for now. Please don't tell him.” 

“I won't.” Linda assures. 

“I'll call you. The flight will take a while, I'll call when we land.” 

“Day or night, on your schedule. Even if I miss you and it’s a voicemail. Once a day.” Linda affirms. 

Chloe is shaky as she places Alex back in the car. She holds her small face close as she murmurs apologies to her, she places a kiss to her head avoiding Trixie's accusing stare, before getting into the car and driving away.

Linda stands midway on the walkup until well after they're gone. Until a grumpy Maze wanders out to find her, as her phone had been ringing non stop, and then it's another battle to corral the demon, assuring that there is no danger, despite the tears. 

She promised not to say where Chloe was going but knowing Maze and Lucifer they'll panic and do something rash so she'll give it a day and at least let them know Chloe has left and has asked for time and space. 

Linda gets her over protective demon back into the house and back to bed. She finishes getting ready for the day, calling back her patient to apologize for the delay. Later she makes a call to the precinct and asks for Daniel Espinoza. She has a discreet conversation to confirm the man was well aware of Chloe's trip and she was not expected back for a while due to the investigation. It’s a little awkward as she's never officially met the man but she wanted to make sure Chloe would not get into trouble for kidnapping either girl. 

When she has a break she pulls up flight info for LAX and finds one flight per day to London and notes the time to expect Chloe's call somewhere around 2am.

Linda hopes to be able to find the right way to support her friend. To support all of them, and with that thought she calls and leaves another message with Lucifer. this time telling him to be in for an appointment or she's coming to him, it’s not a concession, it’s a threat. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Humm, I was thinking that this story is a lot more involved then I had originally anticipated. 
> 
> So I had only wanted to do, two one-shots but then it evolved. That part is not the problem, the other character is, Alex. 
> 
> Had I left it at one-shots, she would not have been that important however, in this endeavor I realized she will garner more questions. believe it or not this is meant as a Chloe trying to figure shit out story but Alex features as well, if the story continues it will be needed but you should still be able to enjoy the story despite this twist. 
> 
> Please forgive any spelling or grammar errors, not my strong suite.


	3. Hope

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A peek at Trixie's thoughts.

The plane was dark and only a few people had their own personal lights on. If Trixie looks backward out the little window, she can even see light reflecting on the plane wing from a window on the first floor. She won't admit it but it's kinda cool, the plane is bigger than the apartment complex, well almost, and there was a bar at the front end where Mom had gotten sodas and candy bars earlier. 

Mom didn't like them to have lots of sugar, but had gotten the snacks anyway. It was a bribe and Trixie hadn't wanted it but she took it so that Alex would. She was trying to have a good attitude for the younger girl who was even more confused than Trixie was. 

Trixie had tried to keep Alex distracted; she had coaxed her to their small window to watch the luggage being loaded, and let her sit in the window seat for take off. Alex had gotten scared, for good reason in Trixie’s opinion, not that she admitted it. Not being able to see land after that was even more scary, so Alex had moved to the middle seat. 

Trixie or Alex haven't said much of anything since they left Linda's. Crazy stuff had been happening for a while now, but Mom trying to get rid of Alex was just stupid, so Trixie was confused, scared and pissed off. 

Trixie cut her eyes to Mom, she hadn't cursed out loud but you never know with Moms. She was currently pretending to sleep, she had her eyes closed but Trixie knew she wasn't sleeping. She hasn't been, not really, not since Marcus turned out to be a psycho killer. 

She and Alex had been with Nana when her Dad had called and said Mom was hurt, not bad, just hurt. Mom had come to Nana's really late that night, Trixie had been waiting up. Mom and Dad had scary important jobs, but they always told when they got hurt even just a little, so she was waiting to check on Mom. When Nana had opened the door they had spoken in hushed whispers and then Mom was crying. She had cried so hard, it was the worst thing Trixie had ever heard. She'd been too scared to come out of her room and ended up crawling under the covers and covering her ears until she fell asleep from her own tears. 

During breakfast she had pulled up the courage and asked about Lucifer. The last time she had ever heard anyone cry like Mom had, it was at her friend Shelly’s house when her Mom had gotten a call that Shelly’s grandpa died. Since Lucifer had not come home with Mom after something dangerous and he wasn't cooking breakfast when she got up, she had been worried. 

Mom had cursed and dropped her coffee cup, it had hit the corner of the counter cracking and falling to the floor, shattering like a firework in the silent kitchen. Mom had snapped that he was fine, then hurried upstairs pulling at her shirt from the hot liquid. Nana had said to leave it be for now but Trixie had followed Mom upstairs, only to stop outside the bathroom. Mom had turned the water all the way up but Trixie could still hear her crying, so Trixie hadn't brought it up again.

They spent the next two days with Nana before they all went home. 

~~~~~

Mom had paid for blankets and pillows for her and Alex once it got dark, she said it was better to sleep now so the jetlag wouldn't be so bad when they got to London but Trixie hadn't been able to sleep. The blanks were thin and scratchy and the pillow was lumpy. She had tried to sleep propped against her backpack and the wall but eventually sat up. The moon was full and If she pushed her head right into the window and tilted up she could see it, it lit up the ocean, the moon never seemed this bright when she went camping, dad said the city light didn't help, even way out in the woods. 

Alex made a few humming noises but didn't wake up. Trixie sighed looking over and saving the devil from falling to the floor. She pushed it under Alex's chin and the girl clutched it automatically. She knew Mom was watching her but Trixie turned back to the window. She could actually see stars all the way out here too.

“Are you kidnapping us?” She can see Mom's reflection in the glass as she raises a hand to her forehead.

“Maybe a little.” Dad had Ubered to the airport to get Mom's car and say goodbye so Trixie knows Moms trying to joke but she just sounds tired.

Dad had pulled Mom to the side before they went through security, to fight Trixie knew but she hadn't looked away this time or covered her ears. She could hear them even if Dad was trying to whisper. 

Dad had called her selfish and rash, that Charlotte had barely been buried. He had said that she looked guilty leaving. He wanted to know what her and Lucifer were hiding, cause shit just didn't add up. Ella had gone looking for him, but he would not let her up to the penthouse and would only talk to her on the bar phone. That hadn't Mom had enough of his bullshit. His seedy mob background had finally come around to bite them all on the ass and he’d probably been working for Sinnerman all along, what with their odd code names. 

Mom hadn’t said one thing back, her hands were in her pockets first, then clamped together, then finally she was holding her elbows. She only did that when their fights had gotten real bad, long time ago. Trixie wonders now if she's holding herself together or holding back. 

Dad had finally gotten frustrated and stalked off and Mom had just pulled on some sunglasses and gotten them back in line. Trixie wishes she could leave too, but that’s not altogether right, not really, what she really wants is for the situation to leave. 

Mom is still watching her, she's pulled Alex into a better position so her neck’s not twisted and tucked the little blanket around her. “It's complicated Trix.” 

Trixie doesn't even bother to stop the scoff even though she knows Mom hates it. She pulls her knees tight against her chest. “Things are always complicated or not for kids. But you got hurt again. And, and everything has been so messed up, everything. And you tried, you were going to leave Alex, and now we're running away, and, and I just don't understand.” 

People on the plane are shushing her and little lights are clicking on around the cabin the lady in front of them has turned around and saying something about being rude and Trixie wants to tell them to stuff it, maybe she does, cause Mom is stepping around Alex and pulling Trixie up even though she's too big for that even though she's still hurt. Moms turns them so she's sitting in Trixie's spot she pulls the stupid blanket around Trixie’s shoulders she says it doesn't matter about her bruise when Trixie pulls back. 

Mom says she's sorry, that she was wrong, that she's trying. Trixie just curls into her chest. She can feel Mom’s chest stutter under her but neither say anything more. They both look out the window, for a long while. Trixie doesn’t bother to wipe at her tears and she doesn't say anything about Moms when they fall into her hair. 

~~~~~

When they get off the plane Trixie realizes she may have made a mistake cause most everyone sounds like Lucifer. Mom and Alex twist around so often they remind Trixie of the owls she had googled. She had only thought of London because she had found a new book about a magic school. She's worried but Mom doesn't say anything so she doesn't either. 

They go from the airport to the hotel, Mom stops and gets McDonalds on the way, cause London has McDonalds. Trixie thinks Mom is just going to keep acting like everything is ok, except when they're eating in the room, on the beds even, Mom gives them a serious look. The, I have bad news look. 

She starts slowly explaining how they found out Charlotte had been investigating Marcus and how he was a very bad criminal that had been hiding in plain sight, that he had killed Charlotte to keep her quiet. Mom, Dad, Ella and Lucifer had started to investigate but they needed evidence since Marcus was a police lieutenant. But when they went to gather evidence it was a trap.  
  
Marcus had shot Mom. Mom said she doesn't know what happened, she gets an odd look on her face thinking about it. She says Lucifer had somehow fought all the guys but when Mom came back around she had seen that Lucifer had stabbed Marcus in the fight. 

“Is that why...You're angry at him, cause he did something bad?” Trixie’s half afraid of asking questions and Mom looks so upset already. She doesn’t like the thought, at all, Lucifer's not bad, It sounds like he was just trying to stop the real bad guy. 

Mom looks away then takes a deep breath. “It's not that Lucifer did what he did, or not just that. It's..he..he and I, we. We haven't been talking lately, not well and that day I just found out information that he had been hiding from me.” 

Trixie wants to ask more questions. She's confused. Even when he first started working with Mom and Mom mostly complained about him, he was always around. He had saved Mom loads of times and even when he acted like a jerk or made Mom angry they had always talked later and made up.

“So you're upset at him for lying?” Alex only frowned when Trixie looked over and Trixie agreed. “But Lucifer never lies, Mom.” 

Mom’s face twitched and narrowed. “No, no he doesn't lie but...do you remember the swear jar?” Trixie finally pulls up the memory but doesn't understand the connection. 

“Sock sucker! That was a fun one.” Trixie tries a grin. 

“Don't get used to it, missy.” Mom grins back. 

“Lucifer doesn't lie, you're both right. But he doesn't tell the whole truth. He...avoids things, finds other ways to say things.” 

Ohhh, loopholes Trixie gets it now. 

“There was something very important that he should have talked to me about. And right now I just need some time to think away from him.” 

Trixie wrinkles her nose at this and when she looks over Alex ducks her head down. She's wearing her sweater and tracing the patterns. Alex hasn't said much since before the plane. 

She knows Mom and Lucifer liked each other before, not only as friends. It had been fun to think of Mom dating Lucifer and maybe they would be a family since Daddy wasn't there anymore. She had told Maze but Maze had laughed and said Lucifer wouldn’t be caught doing something crazy like having feelings. Maze had issues with feelings Trixie knew but she had still been disappointed. Trixie had been younger then, it was little kid thinking, but still. 

And now lately since Alex has come, she had hoped they could get back to normal. Things seem to be getting better, Lucifer comes over every so often. He likes to cook for them and sometimes he'll let her and Alex help. He complains but he stays if she or Alex asks him to watch movies or play a game, or at least he did. Marcus was over so often that Lucifer hadn't come over a lot, he said he was just being polite and giving Mom and Marcus some space. 

Mom said Marcus made her happy but he never liked to play games, not more than once and not if Moms not playing, and he didn't work on cases like Lucifer. He was more like Mr. Torres, who likes to tell you how to do something but doesn't really show you. He makes Mom’s eyes get all squinty like she's thinking, cept she's not, and she nods until she says she’s tired of going over the case, cept Mom’s never tired of going over a case. Mom and Lucifer talk about case stuff like normal, they both have ideas and then Lucifer usually tells Mom to put it away already lest her eyes bloody fall out and he'll help her more later if she just puts it away. 

“Will you talk to him again? later when you feel better. You always said it's important to talk out your problems, that there's always multiple sides to a case.” 

“We’ll see.” Mom shivered, her hands going up and down her arms quickly and Trixie could see her Mom backing away from the topic, we’ll see, usually meant she was done talking about a subject. 

Mom ran her hands through her hair nervously. “There's something else we need to talk about.” Mom moves over to their bed, she picks up all the trash and puts it into the bigger bag then moves the pillows to sit with them. 

“This year I’ve been distracted, and that is no excuse. I am so sorry if I have not been there for you or have made you feel if you can't come talk to me, for anything either of you.” Mom had taken both of their hands and squeezed tight.

“You and me remember. We never have to hide with each other. Alex, that means we can talk to each other about anything.” Trixie nodded, she remembered. 

“I need...I would like you, to tell me if Marcus or.'' Mom had to swallow a few times. “Or if Lucifer, has ever hurt you or scared you, or made you uncomfortable.”

Mom looked so scared and she was shaking. Trixie knows what this is; she’s had this conversation before with Mom and Dad and at the school too, when the safety officers had come. 

“This is very important. I need you both to tell me the truth. Please.” Mom is so worried, she looks so scared.

Trixie is shaking her head fast. “No Mom, no...I’ve never been hurt and/..and Lucifer, he never did anything bad. I promise.” 

Because she knows how important this is she talks fast, she tells Mom about the cuss words even if Mom already knows that. She tells about the driving lesson in a big parking lot, Lucifer had let her steer the car but she hadn't been able to reach the pedals. She tells about the candy he would get, even if Mom said no or the deals for money or cake. And about the extra cash for any excuse, like not hugging him, so Trixie could buy that doll she had wanted a while back. And about the time she told Lucifer not to smoke and how it was bad but then asked to try one and after she had choked on it Lucifer had googled with her stuff about smoking and she had learned how gross it made your insides. 

She’s stumbling over her words to explain until Mom finally reaches across the bed to grab her hands and squeeze them tight. She says’ it's ok, she understands. But she takes a big breath. “Are you sure you can tell me…” 

“No Mom. No” Trixie is more sure than she's ever been. Mom sorta collapses but when she pulls up straight she looks relieved and her eyes say thank you, she pulls Trixie into a hug. 

Trixie pulls back after a minute and catches Alex. She hasn't come over to the hug and she has Lucifer's sweater tugged tight around her. She still isn't saying much and Trixie was starting to worry.

“Alex?” Mom frowns at Alex, not mean, more like she's noticing her silence too.

Alex hunches in more, pulling at the sweater so the extra material is bunched up around her ears. Mom leans over and hooks Alex by the keen and one elbow and pulls her across the bed, closer. 

“Alex?” Mom holds her face and wipes a tear from her eye.

“No, Chloe. Lucifer is, he's nice to me.” Trixie knows Alex is telling the truth but she’s also not looking at Mom and she's doing that thing like if she presses her mouth real tight the things she's thinking can't come out. 

“And Marcus?” Mom presses. 

Trixie is less confident here. Marcuse had never done anything really but he was always odd, like he didn't really like when Trixie or Alex were around. There was the one time he had come over to the slumber party, he said he was just checking in but he hadn't heard from Mom yet and he thought Mom may have had a bad night. Trixie hadn't wanted to go home but Marcus made it sound like maybe she should, so she asked to go home to see Mom. 

Alex had started twisting her hands and Mom noticed, she reached down to hold her hands still. 

“Alex? What is it?” Mom's voice is all soft. It makes Alex start crying. Moms pulls her into her lap, and she just rocks her until she's calm enough to start explaining. 

“He wanted to see the mark.'' Alex sounds awful all out of breath and hiccups. 

“But I didn't want to, but he got mad and said he had to look cause he was helping investigate with Lucifer but that's a lie! Lucifer said to leave it be unless it bothered me. And he got mad and Trixie wouldn't wake up. I didn’t want to. He took my shirt. He kept touching it and saying stuff. He made it burn...he took pictures...I didn’t want to!” 

Alex gets it all out in a rush then just sobs. It takes Mom forever to calm her down. Trixie pats her back but she doesn't remember this not really. Marcus had picked them up from school a few times, and she had taken naps after but she's sure if Alex had been upset she would have woken up, she would have.

Mom looks sick, about all of it. She ends up talking again about safety and how important it is to tell someone when you are uncomfortable. She goes over the rules about body secrets again and they have a long talk about everything. 

For the rest of the afternoon they stay in and watch movies but for dinner they go out. It's just down the street, it’s nice to walk there and they get to eat outside with candles. On the way back the big tower with the clock, from Peter Pan, goes off. They can't see the face so they count the bongs to know the time instead of cheating and looking at Mom's phone. 

After, when they get back to the room, Mom helps Alex in the shower. She doesn't need help but Mom seems to be asking Alex about her mark again and trying to keep Trixie out of it. Trixie wonders if she should just tell Mom that she doesn't have to hide all the magic demon stuff cause she's not a baby, and she knows about Maze and Lucifer.

She thinks of the way Mom’s been acting and how she talked about Lucifer, maybe Mom has finally figured it out? Adults can be so dumb. She is about to say so when they come out of the bathroom but then Mom looks all tired and Alex is still upset so Trixie decides to leave it for now at least until Mom starts talking to Lucifer again. 

Her Mom and Lucifer were partners. That was important and that's what mattered. And they would get back to normal, then everything would get back to normal, they had to. And maybe secretly, a thought that was really small, she still remembers Maze laughing, maybe things would get even better. Trixie really wanted to believe it. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This part worked better from Trixie's point, so I didn't fight it much.
> 
> Also this is a good website that talks about body safety for children and parents/guardians.  
> https://www.anxioustoddlers.com/prevent-sexual-abuse/#.X-PYoNhKjIU


	4. Guilt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chloe has a talk with Linda and gets a bit more perspective on a few of her more approachable issues.

  
Chloe peeked out at the girls once more before fully closing the bathroom door. She's kept her word and called Linda every day and by some chance, or a lot of not paying attention to time zones, she's mostly gotten Linda's voicemail. The one time Linda did answer she had ended up babbling about trains, they had just been at a station that Trixie had asked to go and see. Not completely off topic but an awkward conversation with Chloe trying to dodge heavy topics. Linda had taken pity on her and simply been happy to hear that everyone was having a good time and to remind Chloe that she was always available. 

The five days in London had been rough for her. Hearing the once unique-ish accent every waking moment was a trial. She was simultaneously warry and dejected anytime someone said something remotely like Lucifer would have. It was unsettling and only fueled her confusion. He was Satan, you don't have feelings for Satan, you should be afraid of Satan. 

She had been determined not to think of anything for the remainder of her time in London. The talk with the girls sat heavy in her stomach the whole time. So she focused on them and whatever plans they managed for the day. 

Trixie had flourished under her undivided attention. It's not that Chloe had been neglecting her previously but she hadn't been giving a hundred percent either. She used the time to strengthen the relationship and understanding with her daughter. 

It was nice to have communication again especially as Trixie was getting older. As much as Chloe loved her own Mother, she was just a lot more carefree then Chloe could ever manage to be. She had understood very early on that she had to be the responsible one, it made for an unbalanced relationship and as a result she had kept a lot of things private rather than talking to her. Chloe wanted to be better for Trixie. Her lack of focus had already resulted in one child being dosed and the other taken advantage of, so she was determined to set things right. 

Alex on the other hand was not doing well at all. Chloe knows she only has herself to blame for this. The stunt she had pulled at Linda's and the subsequent talk about Marcus has unsettled her so much she's not talking unless Chloe pushes her, which she's reluctant to do. Alex has always been timid, but she's more listless now, she doesn't do anything without looking to Chloe first for approval. It’s unsettling as it’s very much how she was when she was found and Chloe worries about her backsliding on the progress she's been gaining. 

With this whole other world open to her Chloe's well aware Alex is _other_ and the brand on her chest has dangerous undertones. Lucifer had ranted about it and tried to talk to Chloe but she had brushed him off per usual. He had brought it up again during the temporary placement hearing, because of course he would do it at the completely wrong moment, that she had finally snapped at him he hadn't said anything else on it to her after that. 

But now Chloe is catching Alex rubbing absently at the brand and flinching. It's never bothered her before. Lucifer had made some off comment that the brand was taken care of once, so he must have done something then but if Marcus had done something to, to reactivate it or something else is going on, well Chloe’s not equipped to handle this type of thing. 

This is why she made an effort to check the time zone and is now trying to work up the courage to call and actually talk to Linda. She plans to be firm and direct and not let Linda sway her in anyway by talking about Lucifer. 

All her prep goes out the window when Linda says hello. Then it's a scramble for the shower, and Linda's frantic voice over the phone, until Chloe can confirm that she and the girls are alright. And then Linda just lets her cry. Her voice wafting up from the phone every so often. 

“I'm right here Chloe. It's going to be ok. I'm listening. I'm here when you're ready.” 

Chloe hates this. She's not one to collapse at every little thing. She feels like she's on a tightrope. Everything she's ever known is burning to ash behind her, the flames licking at her heels yet what's on the other side is unclear and daunting. 

Chloe manages to get herself under control enough to actually speak but the tears are thick in her throat. 

“You don't have to apologize Chloe. You're not interrupting anything.” Chloe doubts this, it should be midday for Linda but decides not to argue on it. 

“Still. I didn’t call just to cry.” Chloe sniffles and reaches over to turn off the shower, she briefly cracks the door, thankful the girls are still asleep.

“I'm glad you called. What can I help with? Something is obviously going on.” Linda sounds so damned patient. 

“I haven't had a chance to think about things much. I haven't wanted to.” Chloe's not going to apologize for it either. She rushes on before Linda brings up anything. “But I did talk to the girls about things. I had to.” 

Linda prompts Chloe when the silence stretches too long. “Chloe you were very upset when you called did something else happen.” 

Chole slides down the bathroom door and sets the phone on her crossed legs. She swipes at the tears on her cheek. 

“After your house Trixie was so upset. I tried to explain about Marcus and Charlotte, we ended up having a long talk. They ask questions every now and then but they seem to be taking it in stride. We even went out and did the sightseeing thing. Trixie had found a tourist attraction for a new book she's picked up.”

Chloe trails off gathering her thoughts. 

“That's good it's good that you spoke to them even though the situation is hard children need to know they can talk about it. And taking their focus away is alright. You'll find that if they have concerns new questions will pop up here and there, probably some repeats and that's ok, it’s normal.” 

Linda paused on her end and even over the phone Chloe can feel the weight of it. 

“Go-ah Linda.” Chloe adjusted, wasn't that something else. She couldn't even curse properly anymore. “Things have been so off this year. I had to know, I asked them if Marcus...if Lucifer...had ever hurt them.'' The image of Marcus hovering over a small Alex begging. ‘she didn't want to.’ twists her stomach. 

“Will you tell me what the girls said?” Linda's voice has a bracing quality to it and Chloe wishes she could say it's not needed. 

“A while ago, about when Alex had come to stay with me. Marcus had volunteered to get the girls after school a few times. I was having trouble with the sitter at the time and had this case that I just couldn’t get out from under. He overheard and volunteered. I never questioned it. I just said yes, I was relieved at the solution.” 

“As I would have been.” Linda offered, reasonable. 

“From what it sounds like, I think he was drugging Trixie, Alex says she was always asleep and wouldn’t wake up. Trixie doesn't recall any of it, really only feeling sleepy and she doesn't remember feeling sick. She doesn't realize she was drugged.” Chloe gasped at a sudden realization. “or, I don't even know what it was, maybe it was more magic...hoopla.” 

Chloe takes a deep breath to stem the panic. The nausea and impotence about everything in her life is so overwhelming, it's just not fair, for any of them. 

“He was hurting Alex, making her take off her shirt and studying the brand on her chest.” Chloe's voice shakes. “She sounded so violated Linda. She said he touched it and he was speaking another language over it. He took pictures of her.” 

Chloe has the phone balanced on her knee and is picking at the bathmat. She can't even look at the phone. “I let this happen Linda. I’m a cop, a mother. I should have seen all of it. I'm supposed to be able to tell the good guys from the bad guys and if I can't do that, what the hell am I supposed to do?” Chloe doesn't voice that her confidence is so shaken she hardly lets the girls get five feet from her or that she panics if anyone gives them a simple hello. 

“This is not your fault Chloe, from what I understand Marcus has been living a lie for a very long time, he had everyone fooled. He also had an agenda to protect so of course he was on his best behavior where it could be seen.” 

Chloe eyes the phone Linda had inadvertently inspired a good dose of anger and resentment to go with her sorrow. Linda had worded that sentence so carefully around the supernatural aspect. 

“How is this not my fault Linda? I let Marcus into my home, into my bed.” A shameful admission. Chloe had jumped right at Marcus the minute the man had shown her a bit of attention. “I was so wrapped up in what I thought I wanted, I didn’t see any of it.'' 

“Chloe, I need you to hear me right now. What Marcus did is not your fault. It is not.”

Linda's voice had taken a sharp edge to it, angry on her friends behalf. 

“You went into a relationship that promised things you needed at that time and in no way should you feel ashamed of that. He took the trust you offered and used it. The fault lies with him.” 

Chloe can only shake her head. Linda may be right in theory but she still feels responsible, violated. Even if she bypasses the _otherness_ of the man, she had been used, again. But that's more of what she doesn't want to think about so she pushes it away as Linda assures her again that she has no blame for trusting him.

“I don't know what to do Linda. Alex has been so quiet she's shutting down. You remember, how she was? she knows, she knows what I was going to do at your house. She keeps watching me, afraid to do anything wrong, anything I'll get upset over. And the brand I don't know. I can't tell if it's just because I brought this all up or if it's something other but she's rubbing at it and she'll flinch as if it twinges. Trixie, was drudged or magicked, how do I know if it effected her somehow.” 

Chloe snags more tissue as Linda takes a big breath on the other end of the world. 

“About Alex, this is a big situation for a little girl that has already been through so much. For the more approachable aspect of the situation, I will say it will be best to contact her therapist if you can set up a session by phone or video it will help her. The sooner the better, especially as this happened weeks back. Overall her body autonomy had been violated and well we can be thankful it was not a sexual act, at this age the violation itself is still a big impact on her and she needs help to address this. Trixie may benefit from counseling as well. Even if she's unaware of her potential dosing.” 

Chloe nods along and makes a note to call Mrs. Mott as soon as possible. “Should I take them in for a check up? What can I do in the meantime?” 

“I’m going to defer this to Mrs. Mott, but she may advise on it or require it due to Alex’s foster status. For everything else you're already doing it, Chloe. Just be there for her, let her talk and if she is not talking. Talk about how you feel, it can be about anything that occurs to you or about the day you're all having. She just needs to see and understand that talking about feelings is ok. Consistency, boundaries, support, you're already there.” 

Chole doesn't stop the scoff. 

“You saw with your own eyes how royally I messed that up, jesu..jeezz, Linda what if they take her from me.?” Chloe bites her lip immediately regretting asking. 

She cares for Alex a great deal but Alex had always been temporary. She'd tried to keep that in mind and keep a part of her heart guarded against the sweet quiet girl that needed them so much but that day on Linda's doorstep proved that walking away was not an easy option or one she even wanted anymore. She could only hope that she could earn the right to even ask for that option after her actions. 

“Lets just take this one day at a time Chloe. You have been through a lot even before all of this, and there is no way to predict how you will react to trauma.” Linda was trying to be supportive but there was only so much she could do if Chloe didn't get her feet under her. 

“I should be better than trying to drop her off like a puppy.” Chole argues despondent. 

“Can you tell me why you brought Alex to me?” Linda tries, pushing helpfully. 

Chloe doesn't want to dive into therapy, only she desperately wants to explain this, to not feel like a jerk. 

“I was afraid, I realized everything was...real, that she was, _other_ , something I didn't understand, something i should fear. I didn't think I could take care of her.” The week after everything, Chloe was too afraid and uncertain to give a simple hug for comfort, she let herself be distracted by work and the confusion on the little girl's face at the slighted rejection will sting for a long while Chloe expects. 

“You may have been confused yourself. But you were trying to do the best you could. You brought her somewhere safe and untimely couldn't leave her. Do you know why?” More nudging. 

“She didn't understand any of it, it wasn't her fault, she's just a little girl. She was relying on me and I was hurting her, whether I understood any of it or not. I couldn't blame her for it.” It was an easy simple admission, it eased some of the whirlwind of her thoughts. 

“You can't put blame solely on yourself either.” Linda's voice changed to admonishing and Chloe could practically see the look she got when she leveled it over her glasses. “I can feel you rolling your eyes Chloe but it's true.”

“Maybe.” Chloe whispers. This is too much to tackle at night sitting on the bathroom floor and getting into areas she's just not ready to dissect. Thankfully Linda senses this and tries to ease out of the conversation. 

“To step back on this, I do want to say that the brand is something I have no idea on or any other events that occurred at the time. I'll have to reach out and get back to you. But your right it does sound worrying.” 

That resentment from earlier bubbles up. “You mean you’ll go to Lucifer. You know this is his fault. He knew about Marcus, about Cain. If he had just said something I wouldn't have left him alone with them.” Chloe was getting her feet under her literally and figuratively.

“And if he's been going to you all this time that means you knew as well. Who else knows Dan Ella? Is anyone else other? Maze she's a demon, Amenadiel he's an angel or devil not like I know. What about the Uni in the evidence locker or the barista on the corner, jerk never spells my name right, it's not like it's hard. Who else Linda. Or is it just me, the clueless human that everyone's laughing at.” 

Chloe tries to pace but the room is small, just a toilet and a tub/shower. She hits the curtain pointlessly and her anger fizzles out. “I shouldn't even be talking to you. You've been under his sway from day one.” Chloe laughs at the weak innuendo or at least she means to but it comes out sad, tinged with jealousy. 

“You're on his side.” Chloe sits on the tub ledge and works on straightening the bathmat with her toes. 

For the first time Chloe brings the phone to her ear, from the sounds Linda's up and pacing as well. There's a small ting that comes through the line and Chloe recognizes it for a miniature bell on a replica schoolhouse that sits on a shelf in her office, Linda must have taped it, she must be pacing too. 

Suddenly Linda's not some nebulous voice on the other end of the line. In Chloe's imagination some slick office in all black with a big fireplace and thin cigarettes. She's Linda, fun sassy Linda who's so supportive and if Chloe remembers right has faced her share of crazy as well.

“I'm sorry. That wasn't fair.” Chloe's admittance is soft. 

“Chloe, I'm not on anyone's side here. There are no sides.” Linda's voice is pleading and earnest. Chloe hears the rustle of fabric, a squeak of a chair and imagines Linda sitting at her desk. 

“And thank you for the apology. I understand Chloe, I do. I have been where you are. Heaven, Hell, Angels, Demons I get it. It's hard and you don't just accept it overnight. Chloe, I'm not going to push you into a conversation you're not ready for, but if it helps you, I can give you perspective on any matter.” 

Chloe tries, she does. She tries to think about all the questions that have been sitting, gathering in the back of her mind. Her breathing must have increased because Linda’s on the other end of the line asking her to do just that. The absurdity of asking someone to breath who's already doing just that puts a halt on the panic attack and the cold zing running up the back of her head slowly dissipates. 

“Hey.” Linda continues as a distraction. “Do you remember when we all met? It was on the same day.” 

“Well Lucifer was the night before. But yeah” Chloe fiddles with the curtain again trying to align the folds in it to be even.

“Later, Lucifer and I did start a relationship. And at first all he was this attractive eccentric man that was interested in me, and yeah there was this draw to him but it was not a manipulation.”

“How do you know.” Chloe interrupts. She's never understood or felt the easy way everyone else seems to just draw to him. She actively was repulsed by him at one point. His conceited attitude putting her off. Yet despite every reason not to, and there are so many reasons, she is, was, drawn to him anyway. Chloe suspects Linda knows this.   
  
“It's never felt that way. It was never an oppressive feeling, more like an opportunity. One that I could choose or leave and that's what I did, I chose. That's all he was, uncomplicated, meaningless sex.”

A litany of, the best night of my life, ran through Choles head. None of those people had thought anything of their bed partner; he was just a body to them.

“What changed?” Chloe wrapped an arm around her middle and leaned back against the wall.

“He had asked me to hear him out, he called it his existential crisis. At first I didn't take him seriously, not really, not even in the normal problem seriously. He would recount some concern and I gave it bare minimum attention, until I could get his clothes off.” 

Linda chuckled reproachfully. “I was not my best then. But I did start hearing him more the longer it went on. I started really hearing him, his confusion and concerns. He didn't understand so many things.” Linda sounds soft, amused.

“I put the metaphor together like anyone would. A strict home, physical and emotional abuse. Abandonment, stunted development, unhealthy coping methods. It all made some sense and by the time I had helped you in that case, he was a person to me not just this fun distraction. A person that had believed the only way he could get help was by exchange, that itself was a very horrifying thought, as a normal person or otherwise. We hadn't been together a bit before the case with you and never again after.”

“I tell you this now because I hear your concern, your panic, it was mine once too. All I'm going to ask, is that you look at the facts you have and ask questions. Look at who he is, not just what people tell you who he should be.” 

There was a knock on Linda's side of the phone then the click of a door opening. Linda took a breath in warning but the person on the other end overrode her. 

“Well I hope you're bloody well happy Doctor. I'm here just as you've asked, hounded me enough about it. I don't see why you had to get Mazikeen involved, it's my bloody penthouse isn't it, I was not brooding. Can’t a man enjoy a bit of peace and quiet for once…it's not like I have anything else to do...” 

Linda huffs on the other end of the line and gives an admonishment of knocking and waiting. Chloe can practically hear the heavy pacing steps on the other end. She feels frozen to the phone, should she say something, does she want to? Would he hear her, would he ask to talk to her? She's not ready but she doesn't hang up either. 

Linda comes to the rescue focusing back on the phone as discreetly as possible. “I'm sorry, I have another appointment so I'll have to let you go, I hope to hear from you again soon.” The line disconnects easily but the tether it had created remains his voice was still there larger than life overdramatic as usual, and sounding so very perturbed. 

Chloe stands there for a few moments lost in thought. He had called and left a few texts after, asking if they could talk. She had ignored them at the time. The next time she had seen him in passing at the precinct she could see the question in his eyes and she just couldn't do it. She had looked away and deliberately backed away from him, again, to detour around him. He hasn't tried to call or text since. 

She's still lost in thought and a little shaky when the door opens.

Alex peeks around the door, hair a complete riot. ‘I’m sorry.’ she doesn't actually say it more of a whisper. She keeps the door between herself and Chloe. Her eyes roaming the bathroom nervously. 

She's just a baby, whatever she was before is not who she is now. Chloe believes this, knows it. 

“Have to potty?” Alex nods but doesn't move until Chole does. “Alright come on.” She guides Alex in and then herself out. She runs cold water over her face hoping her eyes aren't as noticeably red after. She turns down her bed for a few moments to give Alex time to wash her hands and wonder back over.

The beds are next to each other and Chloe sits on hers, one leg flooded up and the other hanging down. “Did you have a nightmare Alex?” 

Alex had leaned against the bed she was sharing with Trixie but didn't get back in. Her fingers tangle in the phone cord on the shared nightstand. Chloe gets a look from Alex at the question but she quickly looks back down. So yes then. 

“Can I tuck you in?” A pause then Alex's nods but doesn't climb into the bed. 

“Do you want to sleep with me?” Alex looks up again. Surprised Chloe notes. She waits but Alex doesn’t move. 

“Alex you can say no, remember what we talked about.” Soft not pushing. 

Alex looks at her again so worried and hopeful. “Yes.” 

Chloe gives her a proud smile. “Ok. I don't know about you but I'm knackered.'' She tries the slang and is rewarded with a passing grin as Alex crawls into the bed. Chloe readjusts the blanket around Trixie and brings the devil to Alex as she climbs in behind her. She pulls the little girl close, kisses the back of her head and tugs the blanket snug around them but she doesn't sleep right away. 

Their leaving tomorrow, this time in London has been something of a breather for her but it can't last. Chloe thinks of her file bag from work that she's been neglecting and resolves to move forward. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> obviously I'm not a psychiatrist, but I hope I've gotten a passable flow for Linda here.


	5. Reconstruction

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chloe starts her investigation and get a little closer to working through her feelings.

  
Chloe remembers visiting her grandparents on a farm in Montana. They finally went up one year when she was eight. She remembers they had horses and farm animals, gramps showed her how to pick berries off bushes, if she wore shoes it wasn't for long, spending the days outdoors until sundown. She slept in an iron bed with the window open and white lace curtains and a handmade quilt. Her grandparents had died a few years later and then her dad was busy keeping the city safe and her mom was making future classics and Chloe herself was in casting calls and learning lines and her life had never been that free again. 

~~~~~

Chloe had emailed Dr. Mott as they headed to the airport from London, she had been assigned to Alex and had disapproved from day one when it came to Alex’s situation. Chloe dreaded dealing with the woman but needs must. Her email came back fairly quickly and a call was immediately scheduled for the next evening. The woman was the classic definition of dame, sixty plus and had seen it all. She wore no-nonsense suites and kept her hair neatly pinned, always wore those little church hats. She was very by the book and didn't believe in excuses and had the tendency to undercut Chole whenever possible. 

Alex had her video conference the next night before bed. Chloe and Trixie hung out on the balcony to give her privacy. Dr. Mott had also asked for Trixie as Trixie didn't have a normal therapist and had only spoken to someone two years previously after Malcolm, Chloe had gotten a very judgmental hum for that. After, Alex had for the first time in weeks crawled into Chloe's lap unprompted for reassurance and to cuddled. Chloe read to her until Trixie had come back out with the tablet, passing it to Chole with a sympathetic look. 

Chloe stayed on the balcony and sent the girls to watch a movie, she didn't expect this conversation to go well. Dr. Mott had begun by ‘asking’ Chloe to explain the situation. She then advised Chloe how serious the situation was and how ill advised a trip had been. Regardless that Chloe had gotten the clearance for it and was not ‘apparently’ aware of the situation. She did want the girls to see a physician, she wanted Chloe to bring Alex especially back for this immediately. She had pointed out that well currently Alex was sure that Marcus had only touched her chest or brand, children are prone to hold back information especially if they felt they would upset a parent figure that was close to the abuser. 

The well meaning Dr. Mott had very casually twisted at Chloe's insecurities well letting her know that she blamed Chloe fully. Chloe had to turn away and bite down on her palm to keep from lashing out in defense or worse crying. When she could speak normally she had argued, politely, that Alex had been through an exam before, it was a stressful process that she didn't want to put her through again. Chloe understood an exam may be needed however, with the previous experience she was well aware that any relevant evidence was not going to be present at this point. Without a confirmation of sexual activity a exam was not advised for children this young and rather then put either girls though more upset had asked if they could finish their trip. Chloe had ended up promising to be back in roughly two weeks. Once that battle was won Chloe and the girls were left to enjoy their trip. 

Their days in Paris were reminiscent of that time on the farm, Free and undemanding, they moseyed though with an unhurried pace that Chloe has not felt in years. One day they played Frisbee underneath the Eiffel Tower's shadow and the next, a tour through the Louvre, they sailed on the Seigne, and took pictures under the Arc de Triomphe, and rode a 200ft tall Ferris wheel that was terrifying and breathtaking. They saw Notre-Dame, and walked down quaint streets lined in cobblestone, and tried so many pastries Chloe was sure she would be able to own foodie blog. 

It was perfect and exactly what they needed and it was the only bolster she had for the nights that were her own private hell, pun intended. 

She had used the last week at work to gather copies of every case she had worked with Lucifer, not necessarily approved but she had been working with The Devil so fuck protocol, those plus all her private notes were gathered and she meticulously begin making her own case file on said Devil. 

She dissected their first cases together with the precision of a surgeon. Wading through reports that she had, at first, struggled to explain without ending in a sanction or worse sounding incompetent, but case after case it became normal, they became normal. 

Chloe had been so battered that year. A separation that had only meant to be a few weeks rolled past a year and only gained speed, that on top of an investigation into a dirty cop that ran right into the blue wall. She had worn determination and indifference like a shield while her confidence withered from being flayed.

Lucifer had surprised her.

So dismissive and glib that she had been ready to brush him off. When she had given him the party line a look had passed in his eyes, disappointment, frustration. His crack about corruption had been a slap in the face, an accusation that burned in her belly. The small bits and pieces she had been ready to let go of at Dan's admonishment suddenly sparked. She wasn't willing to tow the line and yes Delilah deserved to be a priority, so she doubled down. 

Lucifer was this whirlwind of vice. He was aggravatingly brash and far too damned conceited and unapologetic about any of it. He smoked and drank constantly. He admitted, multiple times, to doing any assortment of drugs and was so promiscuous Hugh Hefner would have been discomfited at the tales he told.

Yet she had been intrigued, he was this exuberant jackass but she relished the chances to work with him.

He supported her without asking her to prove her worth first. He challenged her, he was fun, he made her laugh, his attention was faltering and safe, frustratingly safe by her own insistence. 

She was not blind to his faults by any means. She could see how his past had left him gouged and hollow. He filled the spaces as best he knew how. He had vises that made her cringe. He could get so maudlin at times it worried her. His mood swung from hot to cold, his temper especially. Injustice rankled his sensibilities but she could always pull him back, temper his outrage. He deferred to her so easily she never worried for herself only for him. 

She worried about his metaphors, as she had thought them at the time. Worried that he wore a mask of who he thought he should be. He deserved so much more she had thought and giving him her friendship had been so easy when he so freely offered his as well.

Case by case Lucifer filled in like a Photomosaic. He had no sense of propriety but could charm his way into an exclusive social club. Abundantly self serving but doled out cash like candy. A maddening lack of empathy but a loss left him floundering. Seemingly no ethical standard but lauded the importance of honesty. 

By the end of it she had discovered Lucifer Morningstar was more than a superficial playboy; he was more than his negative qualities. 

Lucifer worried her, confused her, angered her and drove her crazy. She cared about him, she trusted him but she had never been afraid of Lucifer. Never. 

That day at the loft lit a flame of fear that raced through her memories, wild and all consuming, it burned, turning everything into ash where it touched until she was left alone in the destruction. 

Lucifer's face that day had been nothing short of a betrayal. 

An instinctual fear had her backing up from him. The person she knew was suddenly and viscerally alien, _other_. When he had realized what he looked like and his face was once again the one she knew. When he had stepped forward daring to look apologetic and concerned, that had been the moment she had flinched. Stumbling and clutching the destroyed newel cap on the stairs to stay upright. Ruthlessly suppressing a scream which would have been better than the pathetic whimper that escaped her lips. 

The bastard had the nerve to look so utterly betrayed and hurt at her response. He had immediately stopped, concern pulling at his now familiar features, waiting, watching her for approval, for permission, for something. When she hadn't said anything else, couldn't at the time, his chin had dropped once in resignation, pulling his eyes away from her as if to keep any part of him from burdening her further. 

He had turned away, hesitating only briefly before pulling the knife from Pierce's chest. He had walked across the atrium, as far from her as possible, just as backup arrived and then he was lost to her among the other officers and medics. 

That moment tainted everything they had been. When she thought of Lucifer now, the fear overrode everything she had ever known of him, everything she had ever believed and it hurt. 

~~~~~

Chloe's used her nights in Paris to slowly piece her life back together in some semblance of order. She didn't talk to Linda about her investigation as it were, she avoided the conversation unless it had to do with Alex. 

Linda confirmed that Alex's brand was problematic but they could do nothing until Chloe was back home. She was told to watch for heat or light, because it wasn't enough that it was a brand on a small child's chest but a magical one, magic excited now, and to have Alex tell her if any nightmares happened and to write these down. If the brand had no outward changes the dreams may be a type of forewarning. 

She was also told that Marcus had files on them all and they were confiscated before the police had gotten to them. The files held notes on Alex and the pictures he had taken of her, Chloe breathed easier as most of these were primarily closeups of her mark and one fairly normal head shot taken from her original case file. 

Chloe did manage to have a few personal talks with Linda. It was inevitable after all, not only was Linda a trained psychiatrist but she was a friend and cared about what Chloe was going through.

She had been frustrated with another email from Dr. Mott and her personal investigation had hit a moment where something else had clearly been going on but she didn't have enough information to understand what that may have been, whatever it was seemed to revolve around her and the uncertainty of it, the not knowing, was maddening. Chloe had redirected her frustration, ranting about Mott's passive aggressive emails and her insistence on updates about Alex at every turn. 

Linda had interjected, a calm voice of reason. 

“Why do you feel as if you have to be so in control Chloe?” 

Chloe scowled, bouncing her shoulders in aggregation and shuffling her case files back in order to put them away. “I just have to be stable for Trixie for Alex, It's only me here.” Chloe challenged. “Every time I'm not in control it comes back on me.” Obviously.

“How so.” Chloe narrowed her eyes, she was well aware of what Linda was doing. She took a breath to head her off and then had second thoughts. Chloe had never really talked to anyone, it was easier to hold back, giving too much of yourself to someone never ended well for her. And geeze didn't she feel a new understanding with her, maybe, no-longer roommate, feelings suck. 

“I’ve always had to be the responsible one, Dan, work, my mother, now this with Alex, if I'm not in control...anything can happen, has happened.” Chloe gave a disparaging laugh, that was an understatement. 

Linda paused long enough that Chloe was forced to fill the silence, annoyed because she knew it was a tactic. 

“When I was younger, for example, I had to control how I acted, looked, what I said, what I ate. I didn't even go to highschool because my days were so scheduled, then I signed that movie.” 

Chole debated briefly as she put her file bag away. “I’ve never told anyone. For the movie...I had a choice. The director pulled me aside and said they had changed the scene, he wanted me to do it but if I didn't feel comfortable it would be re-written for my co-star. So I did it, I didn’t think about it first or talk to Mom or my agent. I just said yes.” 

“You gave up a bit of control and Hot Tub High School followed you ever after, not always in a positive light.” Linda summarized, probably nodding Chloe imagined. 

“I went into the academy after I lost my dad.” Chloe smiled softly. “He never said anything against it, he supported me. All I wanted was to honor him and all anyone could whisper about was that damned movie. It was hard enough being a woman, so that was just one more mark against me.”

“Tell me something, really think about it. Are you ashamed of your moment in the film.” There was a challenge in Linda's tone. 

Chloe’s snap reaction was yes, some days it seemed like everyone had seen that movie and just had to make a comment on it, it was invasive at times. She had and has no reason to be ashamed of her body. Yes she’ll worry about weight, health and yeah she could do without the stretch marks or small imperfections but no she wasn't ashamed. If anything that choice was freeing, liberating at the time. That point in the movie was meant to encompass that her character was bold, confident, alluring, and for once Chloe had felt just as powerful.

“No, I'm not. It was a empowering moment for me. I don't think I would change that.” Chole paused in turning down her bedding. She had surprised herself a bit, the movie had held this negative point for her for so long, she never really thought about it like this.   
  
“It's good to hear that you have a positive view on that moment, many wouldn't.” Linda sounded pleased for her. “Your annoyance when it's brought up is more due to the superficial way people view it, if I'm not mistaken. It's also a moment that is tied to your fathers death. Although the physical events were separated by months the release of the film was right after the shooting, a death of a parent is never easy, on top of that you had press releases and photo shoots and interviews. It's understandable that you feel you had no control And why you would want to hold so tight to it now.”

There was a soft tap-tap on the other end on the line. A pen Chloe guessed. “Wanting to be in control is normal.” Linda assured. 

“Yeah well once you're facing possible charges for assault and damage to property because you let your control slip, you re-adjust quickly. Not that it did me any good if I had just had a bit more ...I don't even know. I just feel like I could have avoided a lot of this.” Chloe swung an arm out to emphasize the point, not that Linda could see the dramatic gesture. 

“It is very...easy if you will, to want a life that has no stress, to be apathetic. In doing that you will miss out on so much. We can't always control the things that happen to us, we can only control how we manage that outcome.” 

Chloe nodded along with a hum. She had envisioned, a few times really, rewriting her life. If she had changed one thing her father could be alive, maybe she never became a cop to begin with, never trusted Dan, never met or continued to speak with Lucifer. 

The problem with these fantasies was that no matter what she dreamed up, there was a small chance that she would lose something, Trixie, her career. As hard as it is she is proud of the work she does. The relationship with the people she's met along the way. 

“I’m trying Linda, really I am.” She tucked the file bag into her suitcase and idly moved the girls things from the sofa so she could pull out the bed.  
  
“You have had a great deal of stress lobed at you Chloe and you have handled it very well...Chloe please remember that you also don't have to handle this alone, the girls are relining on you but I and others are here to help you support them.”

Chloe had hoped Linda didn't catch her passing comment earlier. She did feel a little guilty about it. She did feel alone in a way but that was less of understanding that she had friends that she knew she could turn to or family. It was more to do with missing a part of that support base, it made her feel unstable, like she had crumbled right with it and she hadn't figured out just yet if she wanted to reach out or just lay down and let the dust settle. 

And that was all Chloe had energy for so she cut those thoughts off to say goodnight and start their nightly routine. Linda would ask her if she could answer any of Chloe's concerns, gently prodding the red elephant in the room. 

Chloe knew she was worried but she simply couldn't talk about it, she still didn't even know if Linda was the one she should be talking to. ‘He's the Devil Linda. How do we trust who he is? How do I trust you’ so she evaded. “Not right now.” and they continued the loop the next night. 

Chloe preferred the stress over Mott and internal affairs. Mott and her veiled threats, emailed, that it may be necessary to remove Alex from her care. The further inquiries from internal affairs as they had been updated on the new situation by Mott and frighteningly enough we're not surprised as Marcus had a history from what they gathered of recruiting children for his seedy empire, apparently he had a penchant for gathering children that were disfigured. 

Those were easier than the new nightmares that had sprung up in her delve into the past. 

She dreams of him. Things start normal or as normal as possible when Lucifer is involved. Their past conversations repeat. The simple, funny, serious. At the precinct, home, the car, the penthouse, it doesn't matter. What matters is that at some point things shift and take on a dark undertone, nothing changes outwardly, just the foreboding feeling in her gut. She asks him to just tell the truth, begs. The balcony is there, he's waiting, so astounded that she had chosen him after all. Afraid and unsure as he finally admits that he cares, so earnest as he confesses that he's a monster, begs for her to believe him. He changes then to the red ravaged skin, ‘not to me’ she says and kisses him as L.A. burns behind him. She wakes up in tears, confused and overwhelmed. She doesn't go back to sleep after, she's never been more grateful that the girls get up so early to distract her with cartoons and pleads for breakfast. 

As their time in Paris came to an end. Dr. Mott had asked for another video conference with Alex; it left her so unsettled Chloe had decided to end their trip with a visit to Disneyland Paris. The girls were ecstatic and she spoiled them rotten, with princess makeovers, Alex had gone with Aurora, and Trixie with Bell. She reads more into the choices then she should, when their shoulders slump as she suggests other options, she quickly laughs it off and asks if they want a toy to go with the dresses. She gets her head on straight after that and gets herself Disney ears, something silly and light, she needs the reminder. 

They left Paris with fond memories and Motts deadline hanging over their time together. Chloe had no clue where to head next, she brought up a list of non extradition countries, for curiosity's sake of course, and ultimately settled for Switzerland. They only stay a few days before heading to and through Milan then Florence. 

Chloe was very aware that she was on borrowed time and all the events she had been running from were quickly catching up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For the brand I'm not going to describe it here, 1. it's not needed and 2. I'm sill working on it how it looks. but to clarify it is directly over her heart. 
> 
> For the tidbit about an exam for children, I did do some research on this and ran into a few sites that stated this, as well as more horrifying facts, so I went with the simplest information I found. 
> 
> I am obviously playing fast and lose with the foster and police protection angle but its fanfiction so there. 
> 
> Kinley meeting is not to far off now, dun dun dun.


	6. Sorrow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Quick hello from Ella and one more important talk with Linda to breach a few more walls.

“Chloe?!” The enthusiastic shout on the other end of the line had Chloe pulling away from the phone and shooting a look at the balcony doors, assuring herself that they were closed. 

“Ella?” She checked the number again but yeah she had dialed correctly. 

“OMG! How are you and the girls? Where are you? Are you having fun? Are you ok? Linda's here, well she stepped away to talk to Maze but she's here. I didn't steal her phone, I just meant to...well I saw your number. I guess that was rude of me but we all miss you. Pulse I’ve really been wanting to talk to you.” 

Chloe had a wave of nostalgia as Ella rambled. She didn't realize how much she had missed her friend. She had exiled herself to Europe, her and the girls on a metaphorical life raft, with Linda her only real contact. 

“We’re doing well. Did something happen, are you in Linda’s office? or are you there to see her? Sorry you don't have to answer that.” 

She hoped the question was enough to stall Ella until Linda was back. As much as she missed her friend she didn't want to get into a conversation with her. The woman had no barriers and wasn't as accommodating as Linda was when it came to dropping a subject. She also knew Ella had been trying to talk to her about the crime scene and the additional evidence that had also gone missing during the start of the investigation. 

Ella laughed good naturedly. “Ha no, though I suspect my therapist wouldn’t miss me if I left. No, I ran into a Maze at the precinct. You should have seen these two big galoots she was dropping off. Anyway we decided to have a tribe night to pick up the mood around here, so we came to Linda's house to bring her along. Man it's like fate you called, this was so spur of the moment. Ooh Linda’s back, hold on.” Ella pulled the phone away from her ear and Chloe could hear Linda's voice in the background. Ella confirmed it was Chloe and how she accidentally on purpose answered it. 

Chloe listened as Linda assured Ella she wasn't angry but she did admonish her about answering her calls. There was movement, murmured questions and explanations then Ella's muffled voice interjecting ‘Isn't it nice to hear from Chloe Maze.’ something that sounded like a knife, a quick thunk, probably into a wall from Chloe's experience, then walking until a door clicked shut. 

“Chloe? Are you still there?” 

“Maze is there? Does Ella know?” Chloe was proud the question managed to come out more curious than accusing.

“Maze has been staying in my guest room for the last while but she's gone to shower and no Ella is not aware that I know of.” There was a pause from Linda as she wondered about Ella. 

“I'm in my home office now. It's safe to talk.” She continued. 

Linda had been so careful with Chloe these past two weeks. It made Chloe want to scream, irrational yes, at least she could recognize it. Linda had given her time and a safe person to talk to; they chatted once the girls were sleeping about nothing or about themselves or the trip, everything but Lucifer or anything supernatural, even talks about Alex had been censured lately. 

“I'm ok, we got into Rome this morning.” Chloe pulled her sweater around her shoulders just a little tighter and shifted in her seat refusing to check the phone for connection during Linda's long pause. 

“You didn't stay in Milan or Florence very long.” Linda said carefully. 

“Mott is expecting Alex back in two weeks.” Chloe sipped at her second glass of wine from dinner. “I wanted to get some extra research done as well.” She dared. 

“I did some research on a few religious texts, earlier on when I attempted to work on breaking the metaphors.” Linda gave a forced laugh. “I can see about faxing them over to you by UPS or scanning them and emailing you, that would probably be faster?” 

Chloe didn't hear much movement from Linda's end, from the other woman's voice she was navigating a minefield. “I’m not religious myself, so wading through the material was overwhelming. These are just some print outs, highlighted with a few of my notes, they may be helpful?” 

From her spot on the balcony Chloe could see the lights from St. Peter's Basilica. “Thanks, that will help. Scanning sounds good.” 

“Of course.” Linda paused again then let herself sigh. 

“Chloe, I wish you would talk to me. I know right now trust is hard for you and you do not want to talk about Lucifer or how you feel about...everything. I understand, I do, but I can also tell not talking about it is hurting you.” Chloe absently rubbed chest a vain guested to keep the ever widening chasm at bay. 

“I didn't ask you to call everyday to keep tabs on you or to only check in because of Alex. These past weeks we've spoken. I haven't looked at it from a professional standpoint, I looked at it as supporting a friend in the best way I could. I can't help you if you don't talk to me.” Linda’s voice was full of concern, pleading for Chloe to trust her. 

“I know.” Chloe whispered, she wouldn't cry not again. 

“I do trust you. It's been nice talking to you and I really needed it.” Chloe fiddled at her sweater buttons nervously. Linda was right; she couldn't keep avoiding the conversation. 

“I've felt like, if I think about all of it, I'll spin out and I can't do that.” Her stomach swoops as she edges into a topic she's been avoiding. 

“This has thrown me, Linda more than I ever thought I could be thrown, so I focus on the girls to feel like I have my feet under me.” 

“I was under the impression that you were not very religious?” Linda braved. 

“I'm not or I wasn't.” Chloe waffled. 

“And now this revelation has you frightened.” Linda was soothing in her understanding. 

“I didn't believe in Heaven and Hell but I did believe in Good and Evil. You know, as a, I don't know, bigger concept.” 

“I was happy to go along not conforming, and to suddenly have rules that I haven't been following and now I’m expected to?” That was a thought that just pissed her off.

Chloe could hear Linda gather herself. “Chloe the structured religion the world knows as a whole, regardless of what religion, is largely exaggerated. God did not come from on high and dictate the Bible or the Koran or any of it. I haven't changed my views, much, I'm not going to church or suddenly praying. At most the only thing I'm worried about is…” Linda cut herself off.

Chloe huffed. “Just tell me.” 

“No one is standing as a judge, not in the way that is idealized.” Linda took the mile and then some. 

“No one, has control of souls, good or bad or where they go. Apparently it is all on our shoulders we ultimately decide. The concept of living a good life and doing the best you can is very valid. Your conscience is your ticket one way or the other.”

Chloe's aggregation had been rising, her panic to be honest. At Linda's words though, she settled, it was not any different than she had previously believed. It also sounded very familiar. 

“Free will.” Chloe breathed. 

“Mmm, I believe so.” Linda confirmed. “There is no one working as some master puppeteer. It’s our choices, good or bad and we have to live with that. We have been set out into the world and have to make our own way.” 

Chloe did not want to have this conversation, but at this point she was just so tired, she did want to do some extra research but that wasn't going to address what the real problem was. 

“How Linda, how can I trust that he's not what history makes him out to be.” Chloe begged. 

“Those stories have to come from somewhere? Don't they? What if I’m...this is one big game to him?” 

“Chloe, what possible game could Lucifer be playing? Granted I have a bit more insight into his actions just due to our relationship, but just look at him, at what we know about him, at what we’ve seen. Even if he was playing some big collect the souls game, it would be on such a massive scale we would have no way to possibly conceive of it or fight against it. Does Lucifer really seem like that, seem Evil. Truly Evil.” 

Chloe felt the burning sting as the tears gathered. 

“Chloe, you've mentioned previously that you were angry, will tell you why you feel angry.” 

Chloe's voice was harsh and thick with tears when she was finally able to push the words past her throat. “Because it's always the same.” 

“I did a lot of work with domestic situations when I was an officer. There was this one woman, she had like six kids. I was sitting with her for the Detective, she couldn't stop crying. Her ten year old had finally come forward about the boyfriend. Apparently he had been going to all the kids, the youngest was four. All she could say was ‘I didn't know’. I looked down on her. I thought, you're a mother, how could you not know.” 

Chloe shuddered at her own arrogance. How fast her little soap box had crumbled, her position as a cop, all that training, that experience hadn't saved her one bit. She hugged her chest tighter and tried to keep her voice steady. 

“I thought Marcus was good. He made an effort, he was normal. I wanted it. I wanted to matter, to be someone's priority. For someone to want me back without me having to guess at his feelings, or wonder what I was doing wrong.” 

“If none of this had come out I would have been with him still. He said all the right things. I believed him. And he was just manipulating me. I was being used, again. I don't even know why, for Alex, for his curse, it doesn't matter because I didn't see any of it.”

Chloe swallowed thickly and in her mind the situation parallels, she knows Linda will hear this but she powers through. 

“I’ve thought it through and even if he was changing, even if he really cared about me, none of it mattered. He was bad from the start and the things that have been uncovered about him even without the otherness, he would have hurt us eventually, when things didn't go his way. Whatever act he was playing would have crumbled at some point and Go-who knows what he would have done to the girls or me down the line. He was the first murder and I saw nothing suspicious. And it's not just him...” 

Chloe stood to pace the small balcony, frustrated and powerless. 

“I loved Dan, I did, it just wasn't enough. Our jobs are a big part of our lives and graduating to detective requires a lot of focus, I understood that going in. Dates get canceled or missed and you can't take it personally but at the same time he...our family was just not a priority for him. I asked for the separation, he just went with it.” 

Chloe could still feel the distance between them, missed dinners, events postponed. The confusion and hurt as they spoke to each other through notes and voicemail. The apathy bleeding into resentment due to the distance until she just couldn't do it anymore. The devastation, even if she had wanted to walk away, it hurt because he simply let her. 

“You know there was a moment just after I met Lucifer where it seemed like Dan realized that we mattered and he was making an effort. We even had a date night that I canceled on to help Lucifer with something and he didn't even blink. He never fought for me. Lucifer is this big flirt and made propositions constantly but Dan never got jealous.” 

“Do you know about palmetto?” Chloe didn't wait for a response. She had started down this path and was determined to walk it. 

“It looked like we had dirty cops in the department, I was so pissed off. I went to Dan, he told me to just leave it alone and that I was looking too hard into something that wasn't there. He told me to keep my head down.” 

“I didn't listen of course and then it all went to shit. A cop was in the hospital and I had started this investigation pointing a finger at him with no solid proof. You don't do that in this field. No one would work with me, I was a pariah.” 

“He was a part of it all along. He knew what that was doing to me. I was working to clean up a mess he was a part of all along and he let me think I was crazy. Crazy for trying to figure out a disaster he caused. We could have lost Trixie because of him.” 

Chloe leaned against the railing and hugged her middle. She could still feel the hurt of that betrayal, how much it had stung to feel disconnected, dismissed by the one person that she should have been able to trust. The symmetry was not lost on her either, though she made a valiant effort to ignore it. 

“You see it's always the same.” Chloe felt so dejected. What was so wrong about her that this keeps happening. she had given her heart out only to have to pick it back up off the ground and each time it was a little more damaged, the rejection leaving it rough and bleeding from being handled so carelessly. 

“You feel Lucifer is manipulating you as well.” Linda's voice was calm and understanding but the words ruthlessly exposed her fears. 

“Of course he's manipulating me Linda.”

Chloe downed the rest of her wine, she let her body fold into the chair defeated, she didn't even have the energy to be outraged. 

“He lied to me. Everyday for three years. Lucifer tells the truth but never the whole truth. He knew I didn't believe him, he knew. And never once showed me. He would toss out comments about it all the time and I would just roll my eyes. It was a game to him, how many times can Lucifer say something outlandish until Chloe gets frustrated.” 

At least to herself Chloe can admit that it hurts so very much because she had grown to care for Lucifer. He was her best friend, she had trusted him despite everything telling her not to. She had let him in only for him to let that struggling bit of her heart slip from his fingers and still she had picked it up, dusted it off and patched it up as best she could telling herself friendship would have to be enough. 

“Do you know about us? You must.” Chloe accused. 

“Yes...I'm aware of how Lucifer....views your relationship.” Linda said carefully. 

“That year and when I got poisoned, that year we were getting closer, I let myself care about him, despite everything telling me not to. After his stupid speech at the beach, that I deserved someone, and he didn’t think he was enough for me, he would be happy just working with me.” Chloe sniffed and choked on a laugh.

“I fell for it, I kissed him, we kissed, and then I was dying, he was so present during that, I knew he cared, really care or at least I let myself believe he did and then he was just gone. I was pathetic enough to go looking for him, seeing as the unanswered calls and texts weren’t enough of a clue.”

Chloe could still see the blond stripper that walked into the precinct that day, casually crushing what was left of her heart with a vapid smile. Linda was silent on the other end; she had her own run in with Candy and more of an understanding of why Lucifer had made those decisions. 

“He had the nerve to do it again, all this year. We've been back and forth. He's concerned, then wants distance, then he's playing this game with Marcus about how anything he can do Lucifer can do better. I asked him, I asked and he still wouldn't just say it.” Chloe's voice twisted in a sob with the remembered confusion and disappointment.

“Oh Chloe.” Linda's compassion bled through the phone. “Lucifer cares about you a great deal. He is just as unsure as you are, those events....”

Chloe clutched the phone close. “Please don't. I, I just. I'm still working through it, I'm sorry. Thank you for listening. I should go anyway, I...I need to check on the girls and you're going out. I'm sure you could use the break from my issues that I keep dumping on you.” 

Linda cleared her throat on the other end to keep her voice even, she was hurting for her friend, showing that now would only push Chloe to keep her feelings closed away. “It’s not a burden Chloe please believe that. I am glad to be here for you in any way I can. Your feelings are valid holding them in is not going to help, especially given the circumstances.” 

“Linda please.” It was a desperate plea and Chloe held her breath.

The sounds on the other end of the phone paused until finally Chloe could hear Linda opening a drawer and paper shuffling floated over the line. “I’ll get my notes to you by tomorrow.” Linda offered easily but she still sounded disappointed. 

“Thanks Linda...Goodbye'' Chloe hung up letting her body fold toward her bent legs and pushing the warm phone against her forehead as she let her head hang against her palms. 

Chloe hadn't wanted Linda to talk about Lucifer. She had pulled away because the truth was she wasn't as afraid of the Devil as she should be. She wanted to trust Lucifer, everything in her ached for the trust they had, for the comfort and support, their past luring her to trust, to believe. 

The logic side of her was pushing that it was wrong, she should be afraid. Her past, her fears and doubts edged it all like a dark omen. So she was going to finish her research and ask around and prove whether or not the Devil was the embodiment of Evil. She was going to figure out if she needed to run and if she couldn't run she would find a way to end him and free herself and whatever remained of her heart. 

Chloe stayed on the balcony for a while more to let the cool night air dry the tears from her face, clearing her mind to steady it for what was to come. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quick chapter so no notes. I believe the rest after this is more action-ish, we move forward heading into Kinley then a sprint to the end of the vacation. 
> 
> Kinley is next and I'll post about three days from now and you'll get 7&8 at the same time.


	7. understanding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chloe gets some research done and meets Father Kinley.

“Number 113, Help! – Aiuto!, Is there anyone here who speaks English? – C’è qualcuno qui che parla inglese?, I need a doctor – Ho bisogno di un dottore.” Trixie rattled the information out quickly, slightly shaky on her pronunciation and impatiently rocking on her heels, suppressing the need to roll her eyes. 

“And I know your number and Dad’s. And the hotel and how to call for help. And how to use the translate app for anything else. And we’ll stay together...ugg Mom can we go now?” 

Chloe looked around the hotel room pointlessly as she stalled. She had everything she needed for the day, both girls were already dressed for the pool under their clothes and had their backpacks with towels and other pool assorted items with an information card Chloe had made, tucked into the pockets. 

They were ready to go about five minutes ago but Chloe was anxious. She had managed to find a reputable sitter service for traveling families and had scheduled a young woman to come over and take the girls to lunch just down the street then back to the hotel to hang out in the pool until she got back, easy and normal, except she still felt nervous and guilty about leaving the girls. 

“Ok, ok yes, lets go. You both remember the schedule?” She stressed. “Lunch at the café then back here to the pool with Gianna?” 

She ushered the girls out the door and caught Trixie's eye roll from the corner of her eye. “Yeah Mom we got it, we’ll be ok.” Trixie had spotted her Mom's narrow eyes and prodded Alex into a race down the hall to call for the elevator before her Mom could reprimand her. 

Chloe would prefer to take the stairs; they were only four flights up but the girls liked taking the lift. It was an old style open cage type that rattled and was a bit unnerving to her but trilling for them. 

Gianna was waiting for them in the lobby, she seemed enthusiastic, but being twenty will do that for you. She waved as they approached and pushed her dark braid over her shoulder. She was wearing simple shorts and shirt and Chloe could see her bathing suit straps hanging out of the collar. 

Introductions were made and Chloe could see how Gianna had earned such a high rating within the service. She was professional and very kind, easing Chloe's worries with casual conversation. She even let Chloe repeat the plan a few times for comfort, confirming again that she was a certified lifeguard, she had the card to prove it, and she had memorized Chloe’s emergency contact information. Gianna chatted with the girls easily, she was engaging with Trixie but still gave Alex her full attention pulling her into the conversation despite her shyness. It made Chloe a bit more comfortable to see that the girls were comfortable. 

Chloe briefly stopped at the front desk to be sure pool access would not be a problem. She had another round of goodbyes with the girls. Trixie held the hug a bit longer despite her earlier impatience and helpfully tugged Alex along when it looked like she wouldn’t let go of Chloe's hand, distracting her with talk about getting Gianna to rent a motorbike instead or walking to the café, Gianna only smiled at them and sent Chloe a look confirming she wouldn't be convinced. 

Chloe watched them until they were lost in the crowd. She had another pang of anxiety for leaving the girls then her phone alerted her to her taxies arrival and she forced it down, she needed to finish what she started. 

~~~~~

For their first full day in Rome She had taken the girls to a local library to print the research Linda had sent over. She used the opportunity to do some additional research while the girls busied themselves with a few books. She didn’t find much, it all pretty much matched what Linda had already found. Whether it was, Samael, Lucifer, Devil or Satan, the main names, everything she found was a lesson in contradiction. 

She confirmed the notes from Linda's research on Samael. Even she had not seen this name, back when she did her first background check on Lucifer. Too busy at the time focusing on the mystery of Lucifer and lack of a background to bother looking into a religion she didn't believe in. 

_Samael is the angelic name of Satan himself._

_Depending on tradition, Samael can be a fallen angel or he can be seen as an angel who is still loyal to divine law but enforces the darker side of faith._

_He has been known as the seducer, destroyer, accuser and has been regarded as both good and evil in various texts. In rabbinic lore he was revealed as the chief-general of Satan's armies and as the Angel of Death._   
  
_Samael is a fallen archangel in Talmudic lore. His name means "Venom of God", suggesting he is either the vengeful hand of God or the enemy of God._

_Samael: Aimed to be the new God. Aimed to overthrow God from Heaven. Aimed to destroy faith in God from the hearts of humans. Aimed to corrupt everyone and rule over everyone. He was evil, spiteful and treacherous._

_Samael is suspected of planting the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil, thereupon he is banished and cursed by God. To take revenge, he tempts Adam and Eve into sin by taking the form of the serpent. He could be the embodiment of corruption and amorality._

  
If she looked at the more common religions Lucifer was nothing more than a self indulging narcissistic rebel. It was vaguely reminiscent of the man she had met so long ago in a dark club, while it may be true it didn't prove evil. 

  
_Satan is considered to be a fallen angel that was once the highest of all angels. Satan's actual name is not given in Christian scriptures, but it is often interpreted that Satan's name was "Lucifer," which translates to English as "Light Bearer."_

_Satan's chief sin is considered to be pride, because he thought he was better than humans, and better than even God, that he would try to overthrow God in Heaven._

_Lucifer apparently became so impressed with his own beauty, intelligence, power, and position that he began to desire for himself the honor and glory that belonged to God alone. The sin that corrupted Lucifer was self-generated pride. Lucifer is considered vain, not evil or treacherous._

  
Even when she did find more eluding to his evil nature. It still sounded nothing like the person she knew. The information she was able to extrapolate seems to state that even if Satan is evil he has no real power and even if he did cast an influence it was a part of God's plan anyway. 

  
_The devil is considered to be a fallen angel who, along with one-third of the angelic host, rebelled against God and has consequently been condemned to the Lake of Fire. This "fall" consists in the free choice of these created spirits, who radically and irrevocably rejected God and his reign._

_Satan was at first a good angel, made by God. The devil and the other demons were indeed created naturally good by God, but they became evil by their own doing. Sin originated in the free will of Lucifer in which—with full understanding of the issues involved—he chose to rebel against the Creator._

_He is described as hating all humanity and or creation, opposing God, spreading lies and wreaking havoc on their souls. ‘He who terrorizes the world through evil, is the antithesis of truth, and shall be condemned, together with the fallen angels who follow him, to eternal fire at the Last Judgment.’_

_The power of Satan is, nonetheless, not infinite. He is only a creature, powerful from the fact that he is pure spirit, but still a creature. He cannot prevent the building up of God's reign. Although Satan may act in the world out of hatred for God and his kingdom in Christ Jesus, and although his action may cause grave injuries - of a spiritual nature and, indirectly, even of a physical nature- to each man and to society, the action is permitted by divine providence which with strength and gentleness guides human and cosmic history. It is a great mystery that providence should permit diabolical activity, but "we know that in everything God works for good with those who love him._

Linda had been right earlier, if there was a plan regardless of whose it was, there was no way to understand or conquer it, the only hope was to try and stay above the waves. 

Christianity, Gnostic religions, Hinduism, Islam. Chloe tried looking at them all and it was exactly like she had first believed, religion was varied and malleable. The idea of evil changed just as easily as the name. Satan, Devil, Abaddon, Iblis, Typhon, they were all the same and all different. It was strangely comforting. The inaccuracies settled her nerves. 

Her research was limited to what the library had on hand which wasn't much. She had asked for anything they had and they also confirmed that the other libraries in the area would likely have the same material. 

Once she had exhausted their resources, she had been ready to put the whole thing to bed, there was only so much you could pull out of inaccurate material, however the older gentleman manning the front desk had handed her a bright pink post-it with an address on the way out. 

“You find more ok, they help, you go.” He smiled through his thick glasses and broken English for Chloe's benefit, waving his hand in a vague direction to guide her. 

Chloe had thanked him the best she could, shoving the post-it between a book that promised 1000 words in Italian, while fumbling with her wallet to purchase a few bargain books for the girls. 

She hadn't thought of it again until later that night when Alex had gathered an Italian Dr. Seuss's and the 1000 words to read for bedtime. When she finally had a chance to look up the address, she found a seminary school, complete with an academic library, public access limited. 

She thought about it while working through the last of her case files. She was up to the cases she had worked on just before everything went sideways, the memories were still fresh, everything was too sharp, Lucifer and Pierce hovered over all of it causing bitter resentment to fester, why hadn't she been able to see any of it. 

She decided to do one last research trip just to cover her bases, she wasn't going to just let it go without proper research. She spent the next day finding a quality service and scheduling an appointment for the girls. 

~~~~~

Chloe sent a quick text to check in with the girls as she arrived and received a picture of gelato flavors with a few emojis including a lot of the pleading face from Trixie. She replied with an approval for smalls, after their meal, and turned off the sound as she went up to the front desk. 

“Ciao Parli inglese?” She asked. 

“Buongiorno. Il tuo italiano non è male ma potrebbe richiedere un po 'di pratica. Parlo inglese, se preferisci.” _Good Morning. Your Italian is not bad but could use some practice. I do speak English, if you prefer._

“Yes please.” Chloe smiled. “Il mio nome è Chloe. Any conversation bigger than that and I'm lost.” She joked easily.

“Pratica! Si Molto buono. Starai meglio. Mi chiamo Oswald, è un piacere conoscerti.” _Practice! Yes very good. You will get better. My name is Oswald, it is very nice to meet you._

The gentleman was older eighties, in simple slacks and a collared shirt with the school's logo on the right breast. He had the look of someone that smiled often, thick salt and pepper hair that was a riot of curls and thick eyebrows that moved with his expressions. “Well I don't imagine you're here to inquire about this semester's exegetical paper assignment. Unless you've decided to leave the Americas and enroll?” He teased. 

Chloe shook her head as his questioning eyebrows, his easy manner clearing her apprehension. “No, I'm just here on vacation. I was doing some research in a local library and I’m fairly certain I've gotten all I need but they suggested you and I thought I'd be thorough.” 

“Ah well if you are dedicated to studying on your vacation. Let me help you so you can get back out there and enjoy the city, we're having lovely weather. There are many worlds within these walls, yet you mustn't get lost in them and miss the beauty that is left to be discovered around you.” 

He winked and Tapped at his computer to bring it online. “What can I help you look up today?” 

“Ahh, well.” Chloe faltered, she had been fine going through the research on her own but the thought of bringing it up to a stranger was something else. She looked around and figured she was already here and if there was one place she wasn’t going to look like a crazy person this was it. 

“Well I'm looking up some information on the Devil.” She ploughed through his look of disbelief, explaining what she had already found and compiled and asking if they had anything else that would give her a bit more information. 

He nodded thoughtfully, if a little distantly, before tapping the keyboard to shut the computer back off. 

“We do have a few more texts that you wouldn't find in your common library.” When he levered himself out of his seat he used a cane of pale wood it was carved but she couldn't make out the handle under his large palm she thought it looked like a statue of a person. 

He led her further into the library passing the standard reference section and through a set of swinging doors leaving the more modern area and back into an older section of the building. The change from bright fluorescents to dim desk lamps and old stone work was disorienting. They descended a set of stairs into a long hall with books lining the walls and on a second level that warped around the room. 

The air was cooler here and the space itself was massive, the scent of old books hung in the air, she pulled at her sweater and he gave her a smile as he looked back. “Sorry about the air, a lot of the volumes stored back here are very old and need the climate, my knee here cant take it for long so I get to stay upfront and have the younger lads inventory back here.” 

He used the cane to nudge at a chair. “We’ll get you situated here. And I’ll show you the books you’ll want.” 

Chloe followed him around and carefully pulled down any books he tapped at. They were older and thicker than she had ever seen and the way he eyed them made her nervous, she ended up making two trips back to the table rather than juggling them in her arms, risking damages. 

“Well this should help in your research.” He leaned on his cane with two hands, it gave Chloe the impression that he was leaning over her as she settled in. 

“May I ask why a lovely young woman such as yourself is researching such a dire subject.” The cane seemed to have a dragon wrapped around the feet of the figure Chloe noticed.

“Haha...well” She flipped one of the books open. “I work as a detective and I have run into cases that involve the occult and well you just end up seeing a lot of strange things in L.A. I figured it wouldn't hurt to brush up.” 

He furrowed his eyebrows, something about L.A. seemed to resonate with him. “Hell is abandoned and the Devil is upon us.” He intoned. 

Chloe would have laughed but his jovial manner had vanished so she reached for anything to cut the tension. “That was...Shakespeare?” 

Her question snapped back his focus. “Well my dear I think I'll leave you too it but if you need any help you just come find me.” He raised one hand from the cane to nudge a book from falling and Chloe got a closer look at the carved figure. It seemed to be a knight in armor but had wings folded on its back. he didn't wait for her response but turned away Chloe did notice that he didn't return to the front of the library but took a turn down one of the isles she waited a bit and glanced over but he never returned. 

Most of the texts Oswald had gotten for her were recounting of possessions. Some spoke of the battle between good and evil, how the devil was gathering souls for his army that would fight the archangels of heaven. One delved into the devils evil doings. One was the past and present portrayal and manifestations of the Evil One. Others were religious texts and just recounted the same information she had already found. She had this all spread out over the table along with some interesting artwork she had found earlier. 

_Once the quarantine had been lifted, a group was sent to gather reconnaissance on the town's survivors and to deliver supplies. Reports detailed the destruction of the town and surrounding homes, fire had spread and simply burned itself out no containment was attempted any supplies destroyed or consumed. The most disturbing report was that of the bodies. Most inhabitants were found dead in the town church, some attempt was made to combat the disease, a hospital was established, but it seems as if at some point residents simply relocated to the church to die. The remaining residents had simply seemed to fall where they stood, seeming in the mists of having a party surrounded by the last of the town's alcohol. The lone survivor was a young man, mind gone but not enough to stop him from ranting about the devil and his demons before he succumbed to dysentery._  
  
She was a little over two hours in and completely absorbed with a recounting of a suspected mass possession that happened in 1746. When the hand came down on her shoulder, she jumped and pulled away with a gasp. 

“Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you.” Chloe stood telling herself to calm down as the man moved around the table. He was tall and wore the traditional robes with the white collar, so a priest possibly. He sported a full beard that contrasted with his bald head.

“I'm Father Kinley. Someone said you may need some help with research.” His eyes wandered over the table and all the different books she had spread out. 

“Umm yes. Did you hear some crazy lady was asking about the Devil?” She suppressed a frown as looked around the space for Oswald. She didn't see him but he seems to have been telling tales on her, he was personable so she guessed it wasn’t that odd, but it still unsettled her.

“I don't think you're crazy at all.” Father Kinley gave her a benevolent smile. “In fact I think we should talk.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok, Idk about anyone else but I never stop to translate or find the a/n when reading so I stuck my translations in the story. 
> 
> This is seven and I'll post eight right away. 
> 
> For the references on religion, I did pull quotes and facts from a number of different sources I tweaked them slightly but they should all be valid, or as valid as any religion is...I didn't mean that in a negative way.


	8. Belief

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Father Kinley says hello, gives an art lesson and asks for Chloe's help.

“I don't think you're crazy at all.” Father Kinley gave her a benevolent smile. “In fact I think we should talk.”

~~~~~

Chloe raised her eyebrows. “Oh. Is this a subject you are familiar with?”

Father Kinley gave a smile that seemed a bit smug. “Very familiar.” 

She accepted the hand he held out for a handshake. “Ahh my name is Chloe Decker.''

“It is very nice to meet you Ms. Decker.” Chloe started to gather the books, closing and stacking them neatly to one side. 

Father Kinley looked again at the material Chloe had piled up. “Ms. Decker would you like to take a walk with me. There's something nearby that I'd like to show you. In relation to your research.” 

He seemed normal, kind even and frankly she was done reading. “Shure I could use a break.” Chloe pulled off her sweater and draped it over the chair to keep her place. She tucked her wallet in her back pocket but left her purse behind. 

“I understand you are from the states. A cop?” He was trying for small talk as he led her out of the library but it came off as probing.

“Umm yes, a Detective, in L.A.” She clarified in order to speed things along. 

Father Kinley hummed, pleased. “Must be an interesting career. The things you must see. I must confess, Ms. Decker. I do have an interest in L.A. so I am glad we’ve met today, kismet I would say.” 

Chloe raised her eyebrows behind him. The Father may be a priest but everything about his attitude was setting off her radar. 

“Have you ever been to L.A.?” He only smiled at her question, stopping to open a set of double doors and conveniently avoided answering. 

Looking around the space they seem to be outside of an auditorium. Four sets of double doors were on the right hand wall. The school's logo prominently featured so two sets of doors flanked either side. A standard U staircase was on the right, next to the doors they entered from, stretching up to a balcony above and presumably to more doors to the auditorium, or church Chloe considered. 

Father Kindly had moved forward drawing her attention to a large mural. The whole thing ran the full length of the hall about thirty feet long and probably that much in height. Track lights ran along the ceiling, the individual beams situated to highlight the stunning piece. Nothing infringed on the space except a few simple benches. 

“Beautiful isn't it.” Father Kinley looked so pleased you could imagine he painted it himself. 

The mural was beautiful Chloe conceded and massive. It had a similar style to The Sistine Chapel. She didn't recognize it for anything famous, not that she was an art connoisseur, it was just hard to believe it wasn’t known as the detail involved was amazing. 

“Who painted it?” She asked, moving closer to Father Kinley who had positioned himself at what looked like the beginning of the mural. 

“It is a reproduction done in 1988, Laesaeque venenum Dei...Venom of God.” His voice had a tone to it, spiteful and smug. Chloe recognized the meaning of the title but kept her thoughts to herself. 

“A very talented student who was assigned to catalog the basement collection at the time had uncovered the canvas. He was very interested in art and had asked for a space to bring the piece to life, it would otherwise be unknown without his intervention. This hall was under construction at the time and they left this wall bare. I believe they had intended it to be an art gallery of sorts but the young lad, well he had a grander design in mind.”

“You don't say.” Chloe joked. 

“From the little history that was pieced together, this painter was an inspiring artist. He had petitioned to work with Pier Matteo d'Amelia in the chapel but was rejected, reasons unknown. Fast forward a few years and he apparently tried again, this time with the famous Michelangelo, he was turned away, as again his vision simply did not fit into the design and the famous artist refused him.” 

“Is he known?'' Chloe waved a hand. “Out there. In museums, I mean if this was his, unless the student took liberties, I would imagine he had made a name for himself.” 

“No not in the way he had first envisioned, not with his art. He had a few other canvases, nothing as grand as this, nothing more than a few still life's. The student who had brought this to life was trying to get the actual canvas, a 3x10 masterpiece submitted to Piazzale del Museo Borghese. However a fire broke out and destroyed a large portion of the basement collection along with the piece before it could be sent out for consideration.” 

Chloe took in the massive work, with the familiar style the story it told was not hard to see. 

The top left corner was a dark expanse of unrelieved black spreading out and down. An imposing figure was outlined in gold with thick long hair and beard in flowing robes, she took this to be God. God stood as a divide between the dark and the rest of the mural. Another figure on the bottom corner looked up into the dark. Dark curly hair, he wore a robe as well but had that flowing effect to where it covered one shoulder and the essentials. Bright white and silver wings spread from his back as his hands reached out toward the dark, light shot from each finger spreading outward, where each beam then fractured and created more beams, where these beam landed stars were born. 

“And God said let there be light.” Father Kinley offered. 

Chloe frowned. “And who's this then.” She motioned to the figure creating the stars. The angel seemed pleased if a bit prideful, his gaze directed to God. 

Father Kinley turned to her, his face neutral but his eyes held a glimmer of something calculating. “That is Samael...Lucifer, before the fall.” 

His words hit their mark and she looked away, quickly suppressing the surprise; she didn't want to give him the leverage he seems to be looking for. Nothing in her research had indicated this. His name did mean light but she never made the connection. 

“Samael and Lucifer seem to be part of different myths, ah religions.” Chloe argued. 

He gave her a look reminiscent of her mother when she had stated the obvious. “Yes, very controversial at the time. This story is not the one we had been taught, though its lesson should not be ignored.” 

Chloe gave a non committal hum as she moved on to the next panel refusing to give Father Kinley any ground. She was determined to wait him out; he'd show his hand soon enough. 

Around God and Samael the dark lightened, gradually merging into bright wisps of clouds. On the other side of God, from floor to ceiling was a world of clouds, simple rectangular buildings dotted the landscape, all were painted to shine, around these were mountains, valleys, streams, and gardens. Angels were everywhere, with one large river winding through it all. Heaven. 

“And the city has no need of sun or moon to shine on it, for the glory of God gives it light. its gates will never be shut by day—and there will be no night there.” Father Kinley idly kept up his narration.

There was nothing overtly compelling in this panel so Chloe nodded but didn't comment. She could feel Father Kinley watching her now and settled her own look into polite curiosity. 

The next panel was a riot of movement. A jarring contrast from the peace of Heaven. 

Father Kinley helpfully interjected again. “Samael said in heart, ‘I will ascend to Heaven; above the stars of God I will set my throne on high; I will sit on the mount of assembly.” 

“Now war arose in Heaven, Michael and his angels fighting against the Dragon for he was no longer an Angel of the Lord. And the Dragon and his Angels fought back, but he was defeated, and there was no longer any place for them in Heaven. And the great Dragon was thrown down, that ancient serpent, who is called the Devil and Satan, The Deceiver of the whole World—he was thrown down to the earth, and his Angels were thrown down with him.”

This panel reflected this war, on the upper most stood Heaven with an army of Angels. Armed with weapons, they looked over a bank of clouds that cut diagonally in the upper part of the panel. God again stood to the right, where earlier he had given the impression of exultation, now he stood in wrathful glory. He pointed a condemning finger downward to what seemed like earth. A half globe rose from the bottom, a general swirl of green and blue represented the planet. 

Between both of these, a darker cloud bank rested. Angels fought everywhere, some already tumbling to earth. One Angel stood out, a mighty warrior in armor and flowing robes, triumphant he stood over Samael who was on the ground beaten and torn. Shining broken wings hung limp, a sword and shield lay just behind him; it held a dragon as the crest. Satan looked to God defiant but Chloe thought his eyes also held some unknown plea as the Angel Michael ran a spear through his chest. 

“Your heart was proud because of your beauty; you corrupted your wisdom for the sake of your splendor and position. I cast you to the ground; I exposed you before kings, to feast their eyes on you, so all will know of your Evil so they may look to the light of God for salvation.” 

Father Kinley's voice held a reverence that encoded in the large hall. 

“And he seized the Dragon, that ancient Serpent, who is the Devil and Satan. And the Angels who did not stay within their own position of authority, but left their proper dwelling. For God did not spare Angels when they sinned, but cast them into hell and committed them to chains of gloomy darkness.”

Chloe followed his gaze. Resisting the urge to rub the goosebumps on her arms. 

Further down Satan was painted again, his body curved around the spear in a freefall to earth. The painter had captured utter terror on his face. His broken wings releasing feathers into the air around him. 

Her heart thumped at the figure in sympathy. “How you are fallen from heaven, O Day Star, son of Dawn. How you are cut down to the ground.'' Chloe quoted. She remembered the text from her research. The impact and history of it hit her with a pang and an echo of another voice floated through her memories, recounting this moment with such pain.

Father Kinley looked pleased at her recitation, Chloe was never more glad for her acting classes. She followed him quietly as he approached the last panel, far too eagerly by Chloe's estimation. 

The top portion of this last panel had a bit of sky, a nice gradient effect captured the stars twinkling brightly in one corner as sun setting in the other. Again the rounded half curve of a globe took up a small portion. People and villages sprawled across it and if she looked closely dark shadows clung to some people. These people emulated sin, drinking, sex, murder, on it went. Below the globe, taking up all of the available space was a representation of Hell. 

A vast dreary and dark landscape spread endlessly. Volcanos, cragged canyons, deserts and pitfalls dotted the land. Every space was covered by demons or beasts torturing people, people being tossed into flames, in cages, ripped apart, crushed, being eaten or raped and in the middle of it all was a vast lake of fire that held a lone figure. 

Satan rose out of the Lake, towering over the rest. He was a dark red wasted thing, bright red lava pulsed under the skeletal and burned body outlining desiccation cracks in the skin. Torn dragon wings arched behind him and horns rose out of a dark shadowed face, where the empty orange shape of eyes glowed. He looked up to the word and like the earlier panel his arms were outstretched, darkness bled from his claws. The further the darkness reached the more it fractured, reaching into the shadow people, corruption. 

“This Ms. Decker is what awaits all who sin and side with Evil. The Devil works to sway souls to his cause for he has promised to corrupt all that God loves and bring it to ruin.”

Chloe stepped back needing space from the man's fevered beliefs. She took in the beginning of the mural again. From the proud shining angel, to the fallen warrior, all the way to the beast at the end. The story wasn’t the lesson of fear Father Kinley was trying to impart, it was...sad.

“I’m not religious. I’ve never been.” She waved encompassing the art work. “I’m sorry but...I have never believed in any of this.” Looking at the last panel she truly believed this. 

Father Kinley gave her that patronizing smile she was beginning to hate. “The Devil's best trick is that no one believes in him. Since that day, Satan devotes himself to opposing the work of God in every way possible and to attempting to destroy all of the good that God has created in the natural order.” 

Father Kinley's eyes locked on her own and seemed to be waiting, judging her. She didn't know what he wanted from her but she was going to find out. 

“The artist of this work was very devout. This work came to him in a vision, he worked to get it produced on a larger scale but was not successful. Eventually he traveled before settling to study and become a priest and from there becoming more, what is known today as an exorcist. He spent the rest of his life finding and battling Evil. Eventually sacrificing his life, he accepted the Devil into himself, to spare a child from suffering. The beast tortured him for weeks for thwarting his plan, it was years before his body finally gave out and God called him home. All that time and he never allowed the Devil's release. He conquered it then, but the beast has grown stronger since.” 

Chloe wanted to argue, to push back. There was a lot about this world that she still didn't understand, even after all the research she did. But what she felt, standing here, looking at a story told over and over in many different ways, hearing Kinley's claims that the Devil had possessed and tortured a child and then a man to death, was calm. 

“You said we should talk, why?” Chloe demanded. 

Father Kinley looked back on the mural, she followed his eyes, he was locked on the Archangel Michael. “Let me accompany you back to the library, I believe a service will start soon.” 

They spent the walk back in silence until he detoured to a courtyard, explaining it was a shortcut. 

“I work for a Division of the church called The International Association of Exorcists. We deal with demonic possession, people who believe they have encountered the Devil or to be the Devil.” 

‘Of course he was’ Chloe thought. She cut her eyes to the side waiting. 

“We know about Lucifer Morningstar Ms. Decker.” And there it was, she bobbed head. 

“We have been aware about him for seven years. At first we thought he was just a benign eccentric but the more we watched him, the more terrifyingly authentic he became.”

Chloe carefully didn’t admit anything. 

“And since you have traveled all this way to research him I assume that you agree.” Father Kinley probed. 

“I don't know what to think.” Not true, not anymore. 

“I realize this must be difficult for you and I want you to know that I'm here to help.” How very condescending, Chloe thought. 

“How? how can you help me.?” Chloe gave him sincerity and little dejection. Father Kinley had no quick response. “That's what I thought.” 

“But there is something you can do.” Father Kinley insisted.

Chloe raised an eyebrow at him. “What could I possibly do.” 

“Help me. Help us fight against him. You are in a unique position to facilitate this Chloe. Lucifer belongs in hell. His presence causes evil; he is not supposed to be here.” 

Chloe was saved from responding as a bell tolled echoing in the yard and breaking the urgency that Father Kinley had started. She pulled out her phone and checked the time, two pm and a few missed texts from the girls and Gianna. A confirmation of heading to the pool, a few pictures and one asking if she was coming home yet. 

The normalcy of it was bracing. The gloom of the library, the oppressiveness of the mural, Father Kinley's insistence, all lifted. 

“I'm sorry but I need to leave.” Chloe hoped she sounded apologetic enough as she pulled up the taxi service and quickly put in a request. 

“Yes of course.” He started to lead her back to the library. “Chole please, this is very important. I would like a chance to speak more, just briefly, I want to explain. Can we meet tomorrow?” 

He stood by with his hands clasped expectant as she pulled on her sweater and slipped her bag over her shoulder. 

Chloe started to deny his request. Whoever this Father Kinley was, he had information on Lucifer, maybe more than the fiction she had found so far. She was suddenly nodding. “I'll have to see. I don't know when I can get away again.” 

He surged forward as she waffled. “Anytime Ms. Decker.” He pulled out a card and handed it over. “Just call me thirty minutes before you arrive, I will make time for you.” 

She took the card and he led her out the main doors; the taxi she had hailed was prompt and pulled up as they came out. 

“I'll look forward to our conversation.” Father Kinley helped open her door and learn down as he shut it. “Until tomorrow then.” He smirked in confidence. 

Chloe gave a vague hum and waved awkwardly. The cabby had helpfully confirmed that kind Father had watched until the cab was out of site. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for anyone who noticed the gap in posts today as they were meant to be back to back, sorry editing issues. 
> 
> I'm giving both these chapters together because frankly I hated them. They were so hard to get out. 
> 
> Fanfiction in-an-of itself is already breaking the rules(of cannon). You can tell just about any story, and iv seen/read a lot that's been done really well. 
> 
> But I always have to be difficult, so I used word for word/scene of episode 1-2? of season 4, Chloe's meetings w/ Kinley. I guess I like to work around what is given to us, the challenge of it in a way. I hated it because it was so restricting, but my stubbornness won out. I wanted to scrap this numerous times but ultimately I think I ended with something I like. I hope 7,8 and the next chapter come out as plausible.
> 
> Hum looking at what I have here I think I'll end up giving you chapter 9 as well if not same day post by the next night. I want to get the chunk on Kinley out of the way. 
> 
> The mural is entirely made up by me, I did a pencil stick-figure sketch to plot it out, art is one of those things that you appreciate but have no talent for (me). hope it come across.
> 
> So to answer an earlier comment Kinley is mostly cannon in this interlude, I mean its not like they give us much anyway, and if I manage to get the next story out, he will stay cannon with a bit OOC off-script tossed in to fit the situation.


	9. Fear

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kinley shows Chloe the way and a plan is made.

Chloe shifted the blankets off her but kept all but the comforter tucked around Alex. Her breath was hot against Chloe's chest where she had curled upto after her nightmare. Chloe had finally got her to settle again except now she was overheating next to her warm little body. She pulled back just a bit for some space, yet not leaving the bed for fear of waking her. 

They were six days in Rome and Alex had severe nightmares for the past four nights, even after the naps Chloe had managed to get her to take. She didn't seem to remember them but she also looked away, pressing her lips together when asked. It was her tell, when she thought something she might say will upset someone. Chloe shifted carefully and snagged the devil from the other side of the little girl, when she gently shifted it under her arm Alex hugged it tighter and pulled it under her chin. 

Chloe hadn't been away from the girls this whole vacation. She thinks these last few days visiting Father Kinley is what has Alex upset, or at least she hopes, and that was disheartening, hoping her absence, that has already traumatized the girl with her stunt at Linda's, is the problem and not the evil magical brand on her chest. 

Chloe brushed the hair back from her slack face and softly placed a hand above her heart. She could feel the rough edges of the brand through the shirt but it didn't feel warmer than normal, she also hasn’t seen any light show so that's something. Alex frowned and murmured when her phone buzzed on the nightstand so Chloe pulled back and reached for it not wanting it to wake her. 

A text message from Linda was on her notifications. Chloe had avoided calling since the last conversation they had, defaulting to calling deliberately at wrong times and leaving brief voicemails. Linda had adjusted and simply texted to check in rather than force a call. She missed their talks but after meeting Father Kinley, hearing what he had to say, it had her holding back from talking to Linda until now, at least until she had gathered more information.

~~~~~

Father Kinley had stated that he knew about Lucifer, had known for the past seven years, and that correlated to what she had found. Lucifer only had records that went back five years at the time. If Father Kinley knew about Lucifer, that meant he knew about her. He knew the minute Oswald, who else, went running to Kinley about an American asking about the Devil. 

She had gone back the next day after dinner to find answers. Leaving the girls with Gianna, to watch a movie then bed. 

She had called him and he had been all too amenable to her schedule, despite the late hour. By the time she arrived a storm had started. He had met her on the opposite side of the library entrance leading her to a grand hall and what looked like a series of offices. One door stood open letting light spill into the darkness. The room had the same old, dark style in the older parts of the building. He had a fire going and a few lamps but the room was still a bit gloomy, the storm was not helping, flashes of lighting lit up the beautiful stained glass as the storm built.

“Thank you for meeting with me.” Father Kinley offered the seat behind the desk where a large scrapbook was waiting.

“Your welcome. You said I could somehow help you?” 

Kinley seems a bit taken aback by her straight forwardness but Chloe was running out of patience to play his game. 

He waved at the scrap book. “If you please, this is some information you may find enlightening.” 

Chloe started flipping through the pages and at first didn't see anything noteworthy until she caught a word, Devil. She started to pay more attention, quickly skimming articles and reading through the notations. Every page seems to record a moment in history, known, unknown, big, small, every page was a recounting of bad and all of it blamed on the Devil. 

“Once we uncovered Lucifer's identity, we were able uncover evidence of his previous visits with humanity.” Father Kinley had paced behind her to add another log to the fire but he hovered there, a voice over her shoulder trying to impart a certainty of his beliefs.

The already limited photos in the book were getting better as history progressed until Lucifer stood out sharp and clear at a party. “Your saying he caused the Chicago fire and Nazi Germany?” Was he kidding? 

“I'm saying, whenever he visits, death and destruction follow.” Apparently not kidding. 

“Ok. well, speaking as a Detective this is circumstantial evidence at best.” At least against Lucifer, but was great evidence toward stalking. 

“Perhaps but when the circumstances pile up this high aren't you forced to draw conclusions.” Father Kinley was trying to assess her and had moved closer, patiently ready to lead her to the truth. 

“No. No I'm not. This isn't the man I know.” Chloe flipped the book shut frustrated. She glared at him from the corner of her eyes. 

“Keep going.” He had flipped the book back open and this time the events were more familiar. Jimmy Barnes, the preacher that Malcolm had killed. 

“He didn't kill these people.” She defended even as she turned the page only to see a crime scene photo, how did he even get this. 

“Pierce...ok, he killed Pierce. But Lucifer was just protecting me.” She was shaking her head. All of this was out of context. Father Kinley was using the circumstance as he saw fit to help build his case. 

“From a situation he caused. As for the others, you don't need to be the one pulling the trigger to cause Evil.” Chloe crossed her arms. 

He took her silence as a concession leaning in closer. “Look, I know this is a lot to take in Chloe, but he is the Devil. He's not supposed to be here and somewhere inside, you know that whatever he may seem, he is dangerous.” Chloe remained silent, did she know that? 

Kinley took out a small vial, in any other situation it could be something completely innocuous, the possibilities sharpened as his eyes focused on her. He placed it over Pierce's crime scene photo softly. 

She had to bend here, so she reached out and accepted the vile. “I'm sure you have friends in L.A. family, children?” He questioned. 

Chloe turned to him fully with a bit of concern for him to read on her face. “Yes of course, I have a daughter, she's everything to me.” She waited but he didn’t call her out for only mentioning one child. How up-to-date was his intel. If he had the incident with Pierce then he had to know about Alex so why not mention her. 

“Ms. Decker, we know that you work closely with Lucifer. We know that he has integrated himself into a position of power.” Father Kinley reached out and placed a hand over her own holding the vial. 

“This is a very powerful sacramental sedative. Powerful enough to sedate the Devil.” 

Father Kinley's voice was smooth, unshakable, he wasn't ranting or overtly passionate. He was very controlled outwardly but the intensity in his eyes sent a zing that traveled up her spine and buzzed like a warning in the back of her head. She released the vial back into his hand and leaned back letting her arms wrap around her and focused back on the page with Pierce, the tears that pooled were not hard to access but she didn't let any fall.

“Why now? If you have known of Lucifer since he's been here, why haven't you done anything until now.” Chloe accused. 

“We encounter people like this often, it takes time to investigate. After the first few years it became clear that he was exactly as he claimed and not just someone who was deluded. Many stories of his Evil have reached us, a few you may be aware of. Mr. Reese Getty, for example.” 

Chloe looked up quickly. That case had been years ago, Reese had been a contact they used to find a serial killer. He had ended up working with the man to kill Lucifer, only to be poisoned himself. If she remembers correctly forensics had uncovered research in the destroyed office all of it on Lucifer but none spoke to the motive. The team that had taken over that part of the investigation had misplaced evidence so the matter had simply been dropped. 

Father Kinley nodded at her recollection. “We believe Lucifer was involved in his eventual death.” He flipped the book back a few pages and Reese's picture stood out with hospital records dated a few months after his poisoning. 

“He is dangerous, the Devil does not belong here. All that has happened these past seven years could have been avoided if he was in Hell where he belongs.” Father Kinley stood and paced to the front of the desk.

“We have tried to get closer in the past but he manipulates and corrupts all that get near him.” Father Kinley scolded for the first time. Many of the brothers and sisters that had tried had not come back at all to the church or were even now still praying for penance for the sins they committed. 

“So what do you expect from me?” I have been working with him all this time. I've never seen any of this. I don't even know what to believe, none of this is proof of what you are saying.” Chloe hoped if she showed enough ignorance he would get to the point. 

“Ms. Decker you have come all this way for a reason. Are you saying you have never seen Lucifer? It's been reported many times that his human disguise falls away and he shows himself to be the Beast he is.” Impatience was not a good look on the man. Chloe looked away as he rose from his seat on the desk. 

“Just in mentioning his name I can see how it affects you. You are safe here, and with your help we can put an end to his Evil.” Kinley rounded the desk and stood with one hand holding the other wrist, looking like he was ready to start a sermon. 

“What do you even expect me to do.” Chloe insisted. 

“Help us get closer to him. You are in a unique position to help us. He has been working with you all this time to manipulate you. Using you, to hide and gain power in the police force. He must be stopped before he becomes even more powerful before he hurts you, your daughter….I've also been updated that there is another child that Lucifer has shown an interest in?” 

The heavy chair scraped harshly against the floor in the sudden silence of the office. Father Kinley had knuckled against the bruise of manipulation that she was still nursing but when he finally mentioned Alex the fear had her up and out of her seat. 

“No. She's just a child that's under police protection in an ongoing matter. There is no connection to Lucifer.” She stressed. 

“And yet he's tried to gain custody of her.” He gave her a pitying smile. “He’s only ever interested in himself Ms. Decker, I fear that if he is showing an interest in the child. One that does not have a family to look out for her, then his motives….Well we can only assume he means her harm. There is a prophecy....” 

Chloe's phone rang shrilly in the silence and she jumped pulling it out with a somewhat apologetic look. It was Gianna, she dismissed the call but sent a text. 

“I have to go, I have to think on all this.” Her phone buzzed again with Gianna's response. She moved, grabbing her jacket by the door. “I'm sorry I...can I meet you again in a few days to finish this conversation.” 

Father Kinley had agreed not that she gave him much of a choice as she rushed out of the building. 

~~~~~

Chloe had thought Alex's nightmares had started that night due to the storm but if she really thought about it Alex had been getting up at night more frequently as the days had passed. Since they arrived in Rome she had been more upset after waking and more resistant in going back to sleep. The nightmare the night of the storm had been the first that left her screaming, scaring poor Gianna to death. 

Both girls had been so upset Chloe hadn’t taken them anywhere the next day, they had stayed in watching movies with Trixie trying to learn how to sing Disney songs in Italian to cheer Alex up. The nightmare had been just as bad the next night. Chloe had considered going home, she couldn’t get Alex to open up about the nightmares, even if the brand didn't seem to be doing anything, it worried her. However Kinley was a problem that she didn't want to put off. 

Chloe was quickly understanding just how dangerous this man could be, so she had called Gianna early in the day for one last appointment before calling Father Kinley. She had planned to go just after dinner and told Gianna the girls didn't need to go to bed. She had planned to get back before then to be with them. 

Father Kinley met her again on her schedule, making himself easily accommodating, friendly, understanding even, she could see it as a tactic to lure her to his side. She used it in interrogation often enough, did he really think she was so pliable. 

He led her to his office; he had that damned book out again and the vile sitting on it. It gave the impression he was sure of the outcome and that pissed her off. She didn't take his invitation to sit and instead moved to the front of the desk putting her back to the book and vile. 

“I'm glad to see that you've returned Chloe.” Using first names enforcing that they had a connection. 

“I...needed to hear what you had to say. I just want to know what I need to do to keep my family safe.” A picture flashed in her mind unexpectedly, surprised in a way of just who made that list, a part of her whispered back 'well of course did you really expect anything less'. 

She hadn't planned to bring emotion into this meeting but she would use it; she let the tears come and wiped them away just as fast. 

Father Kinley gave a kind smile crossing before her to pull tissues out of the box on the desk for her but when he passed them over his eyes held triumph. 

“I know this is hard for you Chloe. Lucifer has made a fool of you and there is no shame in that but now that you know the truth of him you can help fight back.” He rallied. 

Chloe didn't dare open her mouth for fear of scorching Kinley.

He moved closer, she didn't adjust her position not wanting to give him any ground. He stopped just in front of her leaning past her, slightly crowding her space to reach the desk. When he leaned back she allowed him to tug one of her hands from where she was holding her elbows when he pulled back he had given her the vial. 

“We have a way to send Lucifer back to hell. This vial will sedate him long enough to perform a ceremony, it must be done in a house of worship that is also a den of sin.” 

“Ok so you want me to, what? tell you his schedule?” Chloe snarked. 

“No, I want you to give him the sedative. Once done ceremony could be performed that would trap him in Hell for all eternity.” 

Chloe didn't even feel the vial slipping from her hand. She was turning and out the door, quickly striding down the hall before she had realized she was moving. 

“Chloe, wait you will not be in danger.” Kinley moved quickly getting in front of her to block her path.   
  
“I will be there with you. Just get him alone and give him the sedative. I understand he's a heavy drinker? It should be easy, he has underestimated you in the past so will not expect you.” 

He held out the vial again patiently waiting.

“No. I can't. You can _not_ ask me to do that.” Her stomach twisted with the thought.

“Listen to me Chloe. Everyday he remains on earth people are in danger. The Devil must go back to Hell and the only person who can send him there is you.'' He was so damned earnest. No doubts, no pause to consider the betrayal he was asking her to commit.

She didn't need to stretch hard to bring up more tears for him, she allowed herself to sob in the corridor and huge her arms around herself. He thought she was weak and for whatever reason he needed her to enact his plan, she just had to get more information from him. 

She had allowed Kinley to lead her back to the office apologizing about her reaction, swallowing the bile in her throat from it. 

She had let him speak again on the Evils of the Devil, what he's done and may still do, warning her again about her safety and her daughter's safety, valiantly vowing to keep him away from the other child as well.

She had tentatively asked if the vial would be enough for the Devil, maybe they should bring more? He had said it would be enough. It was all he had as the many formulas had to be measured precisely and blessed throughout the whole process. What he held was the work of years by his predecessor and could not be replicated. 

She had also asked about the scrap book, asking for anything else he had on Lucifer. He had produced a box of letters that had been collected over the years, she briefly saw Reese's name and Pierce’s when she shuffled through them. 

When it was all said and done she had promised to contact him again when she was home to help set up a plan to send Lucifer back to hell. He had also given her the scrap book and letters wanting her to understand the importance of this choice. She suspected he had more but she would take what she could get. 

As he escorted her to her cab carrying the file box for her, she had a thought and paused. 

“Lucifer has other protection.” She started hoping he would fill in the blanks as she didn't want to put his focus on someone if it wasn’t already there. 

“You're speaking of Mazikeen the Demon.” He nodded. “She would not suspect you, she's as devious and selfish as he is. She may be stronger then normal but she is only a Demon.” He said this the way men say she's only a girl. “The things she's done in his name, well, she would only be worse off the leash without her Master. She will be excised as well of course, we can't leave anything non-human in our world.” 

Chloe couldn't speak after this, her thoughts filled with Alex. He had placed the box in the back seat of the taxi for her. As he had guided her into the taxi he squeezed the vile between her palms once more. “I am so proud of you Chloe you're doing the right thing.” Chloe had kept her mouth shut and only nodded at his triumphant smile as the cab pulled away. 

The girls were waiting up when she returned. They worried over the obvious signs of tears on her face but she guided them in saying goodnight and goodbye to Gianna and then into bed. 

Chloe had spent a few hours out on the balcony, waiting for Alex's nightmare and watching the street. She didn't see anyone watching the hotel, she was admittedly paranoid but she still hoped she had sold the act to Kinley well enough. When Alex did have her nightmare Chloe came back in and walked with her until she settled enough so they could both lay down. 

She was now debating over Linda's text.

**Linda** : _**I got your voicemail. It was nice to hear from you and the girls. Say hello and goodnight from me. I’m here when you're ready to talk again Chloe.**_

The phone was ringing even as she hesitated, it clicked over and Linda's voice floated over the speakers. “Hello, hello? Chloe? Are you there?” 

“I ran away.'' She pulled the phone close and kept her voice pitched low, even as Alex let out a formless hum. 

“Chloe?” Linda sounded confused. 

“I don't, didn't, know how to deal with any of this Linda. When I saw Lucifer's face and realized who he was, truly. I needed to get away, I ran.” 

“That's an understandable reaction.” Chloe shook her head against Linda's soothing tone. 

“I haven't wanted to talk...about Lucifer, because it's, I think it's not something I should be hearing second hand. And...I was angry, too angry to actually hear what you or he might say.”

“And now?” Now, Chloe thought about all the research she had done. The cases she had dismantled, the conversations and tidbits she had struggled to remember and write down. The list of questions and concerns she had complied. 

“Linda, why didn't you run, why did you stay? He's the Devil, Maze is a Demon. Shouldn't we be afraid or something.” Chloe whispered frustrated. 

“I don't know I...I was at first, I was for a while. I stayed locked up at home or in my office and kept expecting the worst. After a while, I started to feel ridiculous, nothing was happening and when I really looked at the situation, I realized nothing ever would. I've never once felt any evil or malice from either of them. They have their issues don't get me wrong but with all the bad comes a lot of good. I got a best friend and the most fascinating patient in the world. I've met you and Ella. Had an angel boyfriend for a while. Can't really complain.” 

Chloe laughed lightly with Linda until melancholy pulled her back. 

“And what about Lucifer, are you still afraid.” Linda asked softly. 

Chloe ran her fingers over the phone case and pulled out a crumpled and creased business card. She had read it often enough that the color on the lettering had faded. She remembers thinking it was fanatic tripe, she still does but bits and pieces reached out to her. Even now she wouldn't say she understands it, but it made her heart beat a little deeper somehow. 

_faith passes_  
_through darkness and doubt,_

_he is a Liar and_  
_The Father of Lies._  
  
_a fallen Angel_  
_whose heart has been burned to ashes_  
_and can not comprehend love_  
  
_Do not fear the Devil_

_will not let you_  
_be tempted beyond your ability,_

_you may be able to endure it._

“I, no...I don't want to be, I don't understand why I am still afraid. Sometimes I think I can see a way forward and then...it seems to sneak up on me in odd moments and I understand nothing again. I guess it's complicated.”

“Chloe this may not be something you can answer fully or even right away but. Are you afraid of what Lucifer is or are you afraid of how you feel despite this.” 

Chloe sucked in a sharp breath but Linda hurried on. “What it really all comes down to is one simple question: Do you want him in your life or not?” 

Linda's questions stayed in her mind after they had hung up, circling like white noise as she settled back down with Alex. As she fell asleep she wondered if she should be anxious that she wasn't anxious and if that meant that she already had an answer, luckily she was asleep before she could overanalyze. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok, so this should wrap up the bulk on Kinley. 
> 
> For those that notice, yes, I did reorder the events given to us on Chloe's meeting with Kinley it worked better for me this way.
> 
> I also moved a part of Linda and Chloe's conversation to happen here in this situation, Idk the episode, 3,4?


	10. Decisions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nightmares, bathtubs, and an unexpected call, oh my.

Chloe had gotten the girls up early the next day, she didn't want to stay in their current location any longer. She spent the morning on a few errands, mainly pulling out money from her account, then back to the hotel to check out. She had asked around and found a nice little Bed and Breakfast on the other end of the city. She was paranoid enough that she changed taxis twice getting there, relieved that the BnB did in fact take cash. She had also given them a random name on check in as well, not that she thought she was at Born level of evasion here but another level of separation couldn't hurt. 

Both girls were ready to go home when she had voiced ending the vacation. The news had lifted everyone's mood. Trixie had asked if they could somehow send gelato home if they pack it in ice, it took a good afternoon of explaining why that wouldn't work. Trixie had ended up bemoaning the loss until Chloe caved and got the treat at least once a day, as long as they had a good meal before, besides they were on vacation. 

She had taken the girls out almost every day to see some of the main sights but once they had settled in the new place Chloe had decided to just stay in for the remaining time they had. There were one or two other places Trixie had pointed out that Chloe agreed deserved a visit at some point but for now the vacation was over, maybe it had been for a while now.

~~~~~

Chloe checked on Trixie, removing her headphones and turning off the music before plugging in the phone, something simple she had picked up while they were traveling. Alex mostly slept in Chloe's bed; her nightmares were not getting better. 

Trixie hadn't complained about being woken up she had simply adapted. She was so proud of her monkey, Trixie had been amazing this trip. She doesn't know where her daughter gets her spirit. Anytime Alex has needed support or hell even Chloe herself, Trixie has pulled their attention around and in turn Trixie has been more open with her feelings then she has in the past. 

The room had an old claw foot tub, Chloe had been eyeing it for a while, it's something she hadn't done in ages. Alex was down again and she usually only got up once. So Chloe decided to indulge. 

She texted Linda while she let the tub fill; they chatted a bit by text but the conversation was easier then it had been in a while. She let Linda know they'd likely be home in the next four days and they made plans to meet up once she got home.  
She hasn't had a quiet moment in a while, she was running at 300% since she left L.A.. Life changing revelations, a cursed child, and now zealot exorcists, wrangling two children on vacation was hard enough. As a detective you had to have the wherewithal to look at the most horrible situation, the depravities people do to each other and step outside of it to find the answers. The logical dissection of working through what she knew, what still needed to be learned, yes, that she could handle. Everything else she had pushed away, putting it all in a box, to be handled later. 

Linda's question was always on her mind, she didn't probe at it, content to let it circle, rising and falling throughout her days. Now that she had a moment to herself she brought it forward and actively explored it. What was she afraid of exactly, and what did she want to do about it. 

The memories that surfaced in her search didn't linger but they didn't sting either. She let them come and go easily, not holding or looking at anything too long, to where they wore thin or turned sharp. It was cathartic, the panic that had been riding on her heels for once was gone. She didn't leave the tub until the water had cooled and she was feeling content with her thought process. 

She was just getting out when she heard a noise in the other room. She strained to hear over the draining water and hurried to pull on her underwear when a sound came again this time very much like a door opening. 

She struggled into the robe even as she was opening the bathroom door. Her heart sunk as her eyes landed on the beds, Trixie was still out but Alex was gone. She ran to the room door automatically but it was closed with the security lock, her hand twisting the knob and tugging as if to check what her eyes were telling her. 

Her mind couldn't seem to align properly. The fear of Kinley stealing into the room and taking her was far too real; any knowledge of police procedure in the event of a kidnapping was gone. She stood there staring at it dumbly as her heart pounded with panic until a car horn snapped her attention around, her eyes finding what she had missed when seeing the empty bed. One of the balcony doors was cracked, the blue curtains hanging on the other door frame rustling with a small breeze. 

Chloe was in tears by the time she got across the room. When she pulled the door open her whole body shivered as the adrenaline spiked and released with relief. Alex was there, sitting sideways on her knees in the wicker rocking chair, Chloe's phone was in her hands. She was curled over it, her breath hitching from trying to stay silent.

“...Lo....Hello?...Hhheellooo?.....Who is this?” His voice floated over the line, a little rushed with an edge of impatience when no one responded. His voice pulled away and there was an echo of wind and traffic. Chloe could picture him in the convertible, he always answered without looking. He must be pulling the phone back to look at the caller id. 

“Dect?…Who?....What's wrong?...” Lucifer's voice came back worried and confused. There was a canopy of horns, a bit of cursing, then the wind noise was gone. “...Beatrice?…Alex.” Lucifer surmised, his voice settled but his concern was still apparent. 

Chloe had frozen at the door with his voice. Alex still hadn't managed to say anything but she burst into sobs at his next questions. 

“Scamp, what's wrong? Are you ok?...Where's the Urchin and the Detective?” He was trying for patience but his concern was ramping up. “Alex, luv talk to me.” 

She was upset enough that she didn't hear Chloe so she jumped as Chloe moved forward. “Alex baby.” 

Her eyes widened and there was a moment of guilt as her eyes flicked to the phone, her small face crumbling with hurt. Chloe ignored it, more concerned with comforting her. The phone was forgotten as Alex stood reaching out to meet Chloe, the chair wobbled dangerously, but Chloe was already pulling her into her arms. Another cool breeze sent Chloe in doors, to settle in the cushy armchair and just murmured to Alex until she settled. 

~~~~~

“That's it take a breath. Here, blow.” Chloe tossed the used tissue on the side table, shifting her around so they could talk face to face. Her back rested against the arm of the chair and one of her legs was folded leaving her knee pressing into Chloe's stomach. “Alex, please tell me what your nightmare is about. I know it's scary but it is very important that you tell me.'' Alex had her head tilted down, her lips were pressed tight together. 

Chloe brushed her hair back scritching her nails in the back of her scalp. “Please baby. I know you are worried Alex but nothing you say will upset me. You will not get in trouble.” Alex pushed her cheek into her hand when she cradled it. Her fingers were tangling frantically, thumbs running over nails randomly. Chloe jiggled her shoulders with a comforting smile and put her hands over Alex's smaller ones. “I’m right here Alex.” 

“Lucifer…” She sniffled her eyes darting up to judge Chloe's claims. She paused before continuing, trying to start from the beginning. “....He's looking for me, He's coming back, He's getting closer!” Alex's voice shot up in panic, Chloe rubbed her back pulling her closer as Alex clenched her fists in the robe.  
  
“Ok, I got you, I'm right here. Tell me what's in the dreams Alex.” She could feel her head shaking in denial against her collar bone but her voice continued, stuttered. 

“He's coming, I know it! So I try to hide but I can't. It doesn't work and everyone's gone and I'm lost. I keep getting lost and you, you. He makes you scared so you leave me…” Alex's little voice tilts and the accusation hits hard. Chloe holds her breath and closes her eyes.

She's been working with Alex but Dr. Mott had given her strict instructions not to give Alex empty promises. Empty as Alex’s placement was temporary, she was strongly reminded in her last email. Alex continues, disconsolate.

“I want Lucifer, but he can't help cause he's locked in jail and all the police are yelling at him, bad things, they won't let him out cause you didn't say it was ok and he, he turns on fire! And he's crying cause the fire changes him to a statue.”

Her voice is so heartbroken she has to take a few breaths to get going again when she manages it, it's rushed and watery. 

“And then they leave him alone and turn off all the lights, cept he's still inside the statue, no one can hear him and he's sad and everyone’s gone and I'm alone and I can't hide by myself and He comes to take me away again.” 

Alex is tears against her chest, and the only thought that Chloe can formulate in that moment is, Fuck Dr. Mott. Chloe pulls Alex's face up and rests their foreheads together she pulls back just enough so their eyes connect. 

“At Linda's I was scared about something I didn't understand. I was wrong, that was not your fault. I am so sorry I scared you and hurt your feelings. Alex you're not alone anymore I'm right here and I am never going to leave you, ever again. You don't have to be scared we are going to figure this out and we will not let Him come and get you.” 

Chloe spent the next hour just comforting Alex and then Trixie as she briefly had woken up. She tried to get a few more details about the dream but Alex didn't have anything to add other than He was coming. Chloe didn't push her, she was tired and worn out as it was. It wasn't until she managed to get both girls back in bed that Chloe remembered her phone, she hoped it hadn't been dropped off the balcony. 

She found it on the wicker chair and sighed tiredly as she scooped it up, idly thumbing it to check the time as she locked the balcony doors. 

“Hello?...Scamp?....” Chloe paused as Lucifer’s voice floated up. The screen for the call was still up count time well past the second hour mark. He had waited this whole time. He couldn't have heard much of anything but he had waited. 

“...Detective?...I didn't know...she was so upset, I probably shouldn't have…I hope I haven't made things worse.” He paused. “I know you needed some time….is she ok...are you?...Sorry. You don't have to...Sorry.” 

Chloe couldn't seem to get her voice to work, he sounded frustrated and impotent and over all of it so very unsure. “I am so sorry...Detective, I just want you to know, I would never…” 

Hurt you, hurt them, Chloe finished for him. She could see the look on his face, thousands of miles apart and she could see it. The shift in his eyes as he tucks himself away, away from her because Chloe couldn't, wouldn’t understand. They had lost something between each other, it happened somewhere along the way and all year they had oscillated around whatever remained of their friendship, desperately trying to hold on and find a way back. 

However much Chloe wanted to put the blame on Lucifer, it wasn't just him. Lucifer was who he was and he had tried, fumbled many times yes, but he had tried. It was Chloe who had changed, she had resolutely put up a wall, however subtle and let him know that she didn't care about him or what he was going through. 

She had told him long ago that it didn't matter if she understood why the wings were important, she had meant it and lived it for a long time whenever any of his issues came about, but she had stopped somehow, It hadn't been fair to him or herself. 

His voice comes softly, repentant over the line in her silence. “I can...I never meant….I never meant to drive you from your home, Detective. I can leave...I'll leave L.A.” 

He means it, the jerk. It’s not a threat, he's not trying to run, it’s an offer. A surrender in a war she had never meant to start. One he had been fighting for a long time all on his own.

“Goodbye Chloe.” His voice wavers. She can hear it but it's always been so hard for him, to ask for anything, to believe he can. 

“Wait.” She manages to force the word past her lips it’s little more than a whisper but she can still hear the hollow static of a connected line. “Wait, don't go.” 

“I'm here.” Tentative, questioning. 

Of course he is. He has been for a long time hasn't he, asking for any ground she's willing to give. There are so many reasons to just hang up the phone. She's not even sure what she asked him to wait for, what to say and there's a lot to say to him, it's churning in her chest and not all of it positive, but she wants. 

“It’s ok, Detective, you don't have to…” Try, care, pretend. 

“Will you come? Here. Can we meet, to talk.” Does she mean that, is ready for it? Is this what she wants? 

He draws in a breath on the other side, to remind her that she doesn't have to do this, to spare her. “Please.” She does want this.

“Yes, ok. I can get a jet, I won't be in until tomorrow night, is that ok?” He capitulates between one breath and the next. 

“That’s fine...call me when you land?” Something in her settles, now that a plan of sorts is in place. 

“Yes of course…” They both fidget in the silence, still unsure for the ground before them. “I believe it's late there, I should let you go. Goodnight Detective.” 

“Lucifer, you will come?” She worries. 

“Yes, yes I'll be there.” He promises. 

“Ok, goodnight.”

When she hangs up exhaustion hits. She climbs into bed and is grateful sleep comes quickly. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, no notes that I can think of but I've read this a number of times and I'm burned out, so if there are any big errors or inconsistencies I apologize...there really shouldn't be.


	11. Lull

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucifer did not think to tell the booking company this was not a usual flight. As a result, the two attendants, three Britany-esk passengers, co pilot and pilot, who by the way had ducked out of a sure thing for this flight, are wholly disappointed. 
> 
> (chapters not about Lucifer, sorry(but he does make his appearance)

Lucifer was somewhere over the North Atlantic when Chloe took the girls out for breakfast. 

Chloe filled the anticipation with an easy day with the girls. Early afternoon was spent in a park. When ducks came along to splash in the little pond, they took a small detour and found a small deli that was willing to part with a few ingredients; grapes cut in half, to prevent choking, Cooked rice, chopped lettuce, frozen peas and corn kernels. The ducks were very happy, as were the girls. Chloe snapped a number of pictures to preserve the moment.

Inspired they returned to the BnB and spent the rest of the afternoon in the pool. Trixie was a fish having been in the water since she was born. Dan had insisted, taking her out swimming every weekend. He had even started taking her out on his board lately. Alex was still in water wings but she was confident enough that Chloe figured she would be out of them soon. 

She spent the rest of the day packing up most of their belongings, there would only be two days after this before she was supposed to head back after all and it was better then checking her phone anxiously every five minutes. 

They had just finished dinner when her phone finally rang. “Hello?” She shifted Trixie over to hold Alex's hand as they walked back to the BnB. Both girls were watching her, this was the first call she's taken while on vacation, that they knew of anyway. 

“Detective? Hello! We’ve landed, the flight crew and I.” He corrected quickly.

“I’m picking up a car now and should be in the city center in forty minutes. I can find a hotel after, if you wanted to meet right away? to talk?” He still sounded hesitant, only she could hear his normal exuberance under it as well. It made Chloe smile. 

“Um, Hi I hope the flight was, good..." Really.

"I'm sorry, I really didn't think things through with you getting in so late.” Despite expecting him, she hadn't really expected him.

“Oh. that's, understandable." He sounded off center. Lucifer was a being in motion, you could redirect him but without a goal it left him aimless.

“It's best if I don't leave the girls alone right now.” Chloe paused as they left the busier district, the quiet neighborhood settled around them and she tugged Alex along who tugged Trixie. 

"The scamp must be having nightmares then? That's what the call was about, I imagine.” He sounded a bit unsettled by that. “Well that's alright. I can settle in somewhere. You let me know what works best for you.” He appeased. 

Trixie was frowning as she tried to work out who Chloe was talking to. she was far to quiet and her head was tilted to catch the voice on the phone. “How about I meet you tomorrow there's a spot near the Colosseum. I'll text you the address we can meet early if you're not too tired, say nine?” Chloe offered. 

“Yes, I can be there, if you still want to meet that is. You can change your mind.” His voice was light but Chloe could hear the apprehension.

“Yes, I'll be there. You can say no too.” She forced herself to say it. 

“No, I want to.” He confirmed. “looks like there's a hotel nearby that will work for me. I’ll be alright for the night...So nine am?” She could feel his nerves. 

“Yeah, tomorrow...I, I’m glad you came.” She admitted, stopping just before they had to cross the street. 

Trixie had her eyes narrowed and a wide grin as she stared at her. Alex was whispering for Trixie to tell her who was on the phone. 

“As am I Detective.” There was a shout behind him, he pulled the phone away then came back. “Looks like my car’s ready.” 

“Well then, I better let you go. Good night again, until tomorrow?” She found herself biting her lip and corrected it as Trixie smirked at her. 

“Tomorrow.” His voice sounded amused and indulging. “Goodnight to you Detective, and the heathens.” 

She could feel the nervous little smile on her face even as he clicked off. They were really going to do this then. 

“Who was it Mom. Gianna? Are you leaving to meet someone?” Trixie was going for nonchalant but clearly had an idea of who had called, going by the teasing look on her face. Alex frowned and squeezed Chloe’s hand. 

“No it was not Gianna, I'm not going anywhere tonight.” She evaded and squeezed Alex back in reassurance.

Trixie narrowed her eyes, she was going to probe more but Alex beat her to it. “Can we go with you tomorrow? I don't wanna stay with Gianna again.” She pleaded. 

Chloe had planned to meet him alone. She had a list of things to go over with him, all the things he's said in passing, all the odd occurrences during cases. She wanted to turn over every rock. To lance every wound and start again. She didn't want to move forward with any lies, not anymore. 

Both girls were waiting. Alex clinging to her hand, still so very afraid. Trixie hopeful. There was no reason not to take the girls really and she didn't want to call a service. She hadn't seen anything from Kinley so she hoped he wasn't following her. He really had no reason to, she was just paranoid but she had no desire to leave the girls regardless. Maybe she didn't need to line him up for the firing squad right off. 

She shook Alex's hand playfully. “We’ll see, how about we make tomorrow our last sightseeing day?” 

Trixie jumped and spun around grinning at Alex. “That means yes.” She tuned so she was skipping sideways. “We're going to the Colosseum? Right. Who are we going to meet Mom, is it….” Trixie was pleased with herself; she seemed to know who was on the phone but Alex hadn't caught up. 

Chloe quickly butted in. “How about we leave it as a surprise? In case our plans have to change.” Trixie wrinkled her nose and probably would have argued but Chloe shot her eyes to Alex. 

Alex had a bit of an attachment to Lucifer, understandable as he had been the one to find her in the warehouse and break the collar off of her. Though he lamented the entire time, he had sat with her for hours at the hospital, when she had refused to unlatch from him. 

Once the circus of placement was figured out he was over practically every week to see her. He said it was to keep an eye on her, Chloe didn't understand his suspicion at the time so likely true, but also true Lucifer had no resistance when two little girls cornered him into another visit, you would think the Devil would be able to see the trap they usually set. 

“Ok...hey! did you know we can actually stand where gladiators fought and walk through the underground tunnels to see where lions were held.” 

“There's lions there now?” Alex asked worried. 

They chatted about the Colosseum the rest of the way back. Thankfully the girls were easy to distract. Chloe read them a story and had a talk with Alex before bed. 

Per her research, she encouraged Alex to talk about the nightmare again and asked her to try and come up with ways to make it less scary. They had settled on imagining a whistle so Chloe could find her if she was lost, and Chloe had told her a secret way of opening the jail if Lucifer was in there again. Alex however was still adamant that _He_ was coming and as that was probably the only real possibility in the nightmares, Chloe could only reassure her that she wouldn’t let _Him_ take her again and if he did Chloe would come for her. 

She went to bed relaxed and admittedly excited about tomorrow. 

~~~~~

“Mom, we're gonna be late!” Trixie pushed the bathroom door open poking her head in. 

“Were not going to be late.” Chloe denied. 

“Hey, can I have make up? I wanna look fancy too.” She bounced in. “Alex come get makeup too!” 

“Trix don't yell.” Chloe flushed, and eyed herself in the mirror. “You think I look fancy?” 

It was going to be a hot day so she had worn the sundress she had found in Milan. It was a red with a white lace trim around the bodice and the four sections that fell just under her knees. A rose print was scattered about also in a white outline. It was simple. 

“We're all wearing the new dresses.” Chloe reminded in an attempt to counter Trixie’s assessment. 

Trixie looked up from routing through the makeup bag, her eyes sweeping over Chloe. “Well, you're wearing the new dress, and you know, you did your eyes.” 

“I always do my eyes.” Chloe looked back in the mirror. It was just her day look, maybe a little more on point. 

“You did your hair too.” Alex piped up, she twisted so her own sundress fluffed around her knees. Chloe had found one with a square neckline to cover her brand. Trixie's dress was a simple slip cut. 

Chloe smiled at them before looking back into the mirror. She pulled her hair to the side to adjust the tie for the dress. She had worked some waves into hair today but she’s done that often before.

Trixie found her prize and pulled the smaller girl to sit on the toilet. “Go like this Alex.” Trixie pushed her lips out in the fish face move. “And you're using the nice makeup, with mascara. That's fancy Mom...for you.” Chloe huffed at the slight, yet she couldn't deny it. 

“Soft lips Trixie, Alex.” Chloe reminded them as she turned right then left, she rolled her eyes maybe she had made an effort. 

“Mom?” Trixie wheedled. 

“Yeah Trix.” She subtly tried to tease her hair. 

“Is this a date?” Chloe froze and caught Trixie’s eyes in the mirror. Her daughter looked far to pleased. 

“Ok, we're done here. Let's get going.” Chloe swept the 'fancy' makeup into the bag and had to dab at the light pink shimmer gloss on both girls as Trixie had applied too much. 

By the time they had gotten out the door Chloe had to admit they were late. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bread(an crackers) is Bad for ducks who knew! be kind to ducks people. 
> 
> ok both these final chapters are short so you'll get them both/within the next hour or so.


	12. Tangible

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucifer decides to stop for flowers, they come with a side of advice he didn't ask for. How the bloody hell is he to be himself and simultaneously not try too hard. He fingers the off the rack linen shit and bemoans his three piece Versace, scowling as the young clerk tries on the vest and his mother fusses around him. 
> 
> (also not about Lucifer, I would say sorry but it was fun sneaking him in)

“Mi scusi, sorry, scusa.” Chloe had not anticipated the crowd that would be out today. She had both girls by the hands and was forced to move at a moderate walk, and this was just to get to the square. 

She wouldn't have felt so frustrated if they weren't late or if she hadn't left her phone back at the BnB. She had it the first time they left but some time between Alex's request to use the bathroom and her forgetting her wallet she had put it down and forgotten it. Between that and the taxi going around the normal routes to avoid traffic, only to get caught in some snarl, they were two hours late. 

Chloe pulled the girls to the side as they finally cleared the small street into the square proper. She just wanted a moment to breathe. The outer edge of the square was ringed with two layers of market stalls selling everything from food to clothing. The space was already bustling with shoppers and looky-loos. The Grande Piazza Del Mercato was exactly as promised, a grand space dedicated as an open market/sometimes fair ground. 

“Ok this place is very big and very crowded. I want both of you to stay with me at all times, ok. You remember how to ask for help? And you have your cards?” Both girls patted at their pockets where she had stuck the information cards she had made for them, written in English and Italian with contact information in the event they got lost. 

Alex squeezed her hand and tucked closer to her side eyeing the crowd that surged around them. 

“Mom who are we meeting?” Trixie coxed on her other side, rising on tiptoes, craning to see everything. 

Chloe looked past the stalls into the center of the square but in this section it was mostly a large space filled with some simple carnival rides. She had asked Lucifer to meet near the fountain as it should have been an easy landmark but she couldn't even see it from where they were. 

“It wouldn't be a surprise if I told you.'' Chloe tried distractedly, she started moving to the right, between the stalls where a kind of walkway was established. The square was more of a large rectangle so the fountain must be on the other end she reasoned.

“Oh Mom look there's those square things. Sag goalies. We have to try them.” Trixie easily let the subject drop, moving on to the new sights and smells, ready to explore. 

“Sgagliozze.” Chloe corrected, they did smell good. “We can come back to them, we are already late remember.” 

She hurried them as quickly as possible, glad she hadn't moved into the open part with the fair rides as everything distracted them. Trixie was more vocal and content to point out new sights but Alex tripped often when she paused to look at something only to be tugged along by Chloe or Trixie. 

“Wait, Chloe, my sandal.” Alex had stumbled again but this time a sandal was left behind. Chloe released her so she could grab it and then redirected to a small seating area someone had set up between two food booths. They managed to snag a table with two chairs. Chloe helped with the sandal straps, she actually buckled them this time, Alex had only treaded the strap the buck proving a bit tricky for her. 

“Ok let's rest for a minute.'' Chloe gave Trixie her seat and stood. There were a few store fronts in the square, she could ask if anyone had a phone to use, to try and get a hold of Lucifer. She didn't want to wander around with two kids and risk missing him, that's if he hadn't already left. 

She was idly people-watching as she thought. They were in a busy section near another street entrance but when she looked across the table she spotted the fountain. From her spot, across from a moving crowd, through a booth making different batches of popcorn in large kettles that steamed, she spotted him, Lucifer. 

They couldn't have been more than 20 yard apart, she was going to get the girls moving again when he looked up and around, he had a slight frown on his face as he surveyed the crowd. There were too many moving bodies between them for him to see her. He huffed and looked down again, his phone, he jiggled it absentmindedly before shoving it into a pocket. 

She watched him a bit fascinated. He was alone, an oddity or him especially in a crowd. Usually very sociable, he warded off the people that tried to approach him with a glare and he was fidgeting. 

He had come out sans his normal ensemble. Dressing simply for the day, slacks, belt, linen button up. He had sunglasses tucked into the top pocket, as she watched he pulled them out fiddled slightly and put them up back. He surveyed the crowd again then turned reaching for a bouquet he had left on the fountain wall, wild flowers very simple.

He held them up against his chest briefly until his arm surrendered to gravity. He tapped them against his leg a few times until he noticed a few of the petals falling loose then quickly put them back on the wall. He shook his head at his own actions even as he reached to adjust cufflinks he wasn't wearing. He tried to divert, grabbing for a jacket only to smooth down his shirt instead. 

She could practically hear him growl as he shoved his hands in his pockets. 

He paced a few steps before turning and pacing again. He reached for the flowers only to stop and rub the back of his neck in frustration. He looked around the square again before finally pulling out his phone. There wasn't going to be any updates from her on it, the reason was innocent enough but to Lucifer, he seemed to pull the worst reason from it. 

Chloe's breath caught at the look on his face. It wasn't disappointment though that was there. It was the look of acceptance on his face that had her heart breaking for him. He was hurt and disappointed but over all of it he simply accepted it. 

He had told her once, many times actually, that he wasn’t worth it. She knew, knew that he believed it. She had surmised previously that he had to have been deeply hurt once, to be the person he was, overindulgent, disconnected. She knew but she had never quite seen things from his perspective, never quite understood just how much she affected him. 

It was so easy to put the blame on Lucifer, he made it so easy to keep him at a distance. She had at first tolerated him, slowly becoming colleagues, then friends. She wasn't blind of course he was attractive but as they became closer it only made the possibility of more, frightening. If she had given in to his advances, only to discover that she was nothing more then another warm body, it would have killed her. So she had shored up the walls to protect the friendship that had come to mean everything to her. 

Her stubborn resistance did nothing ultimately, he didn't have to scale her walls she let him in. They hadn't even had a chance to let anything settle or to figure out their definition and he had run, her fears realized. She had blamed it all on him, with every, tear, doubt, and rationalization she put the walls back up. When Marcus came around she had made a room for him because at least someone cared. She had ignored Lucifer's pain even as he battered against the walls begging her to see him. 

She could see it in his face now as he put his phone away. 

His face was empty as he looked around again. Anger flared briefly and fizzed out just as fast, he was stupid to come all the way out here, to wait pointlessly, stupid to expect anything more, to hope. 

He stalked away intent to leave, only to freeze a few paces away, his hands curling into fists. He turned back to the fountain, snarling at a wayward teen who had scooped up the abandoned bouquet, he snatched the flowers back with one hand and tossed a bill at the boy with the other, sending him away with a sharp look. 

Alone again he brought them up fluffing them idly, his shoulders dropped with a sigh she could see from where she was. He placed them down again adjusting them until he simply stood there making a silent decision. He nodded and looked up and through the crowd without actually seeing anyone, expecting anyone.

“Mom! Mom please!” Trixie tugged at her arm sharply, she was pressed right into her side, her chin digging into her sternum as she looked up, her face crumpled in distress. 

“I'm sorry. What is it, monkey what's wrong?'' Chloe wiped at her face but there were no tears. Her heart was beating fast and an ache sat in the back of her throat but the tears were absent, there weren't enough for a hurt that deep. 

Alex was still in her chair but very worried as she looked up at Chloe her hands clamped onto the table Chloe hugged Trixie to her side and smoothed her hand over Alex’s smaller ones until she released one for Chloe to hold. 

“I'm sorry I zoned out. What's wrong? Why are you upset?” Chloe flicked her eyes over to Lucifer and back to Trixie. “We can leave?'' She knew the girls hadn’t spotted him but Trixie knew they were meeting Lucifer. 

Trixie shook her head frantically. “No! That's what I mean. You looked so upset but we don't have to leave Mom. It's ok. I know you were doing research but.” Trixie swallowed and looked to Alex. “You shouldn't be afraid. That research is wrong about him, he’s not like that. He's good. He saved us and he keeps you safe at work. He's our friend, our family.” Trixie was so worried tripping over herself to get her thoughts out. 

“I know monkey.” Chloe was calm enough that it stopped Trixie’s rant. 

“You know?” she sputtered. 

“Know what.” Alex echoed. 

“I do. How do you know?'' Chloe should have been surprised, maybe concerned but it simply wasn't there. The way Trixie was eyeing her she felt the same. 

“Cause he said so.” Innocent and simple. 

“He always tells the truth...and I saw Maze’s face” Maze had a face too? 

“She tried to say it was a costume but I figured it out….and I saw his eyes shine, you know, when I was kidnaped and he died and got better but I was far away and thought maybe I didn't see it.” 

Trixie was not the least bit concerned about any of it; she had that look of apprehension on her face but more due to the fact that this was something she hadn't shared with Chloe.

“You haven't seen his face.” Chloe didn't bother asking if she was frightened. 

“No but Maze described it, I guess it's scary but it really sounded sad.” Her baby had a bigger heart and clearer sight then Chloe had. 

“Lucifer's devil face? It is scary but only to the bad guys.” Alex smiled at them then frowned. “It's a secret tho.” 

“Alex when did you see Lucifer's face.'' Chloe was a bit stunned at her confession. Alex was a lot more sensitive than Trixie and younger. “I'm not mad, just curious.” Chloe assured.

“Mmm when he found me, in the dark. He said he was sorry and that was just for bad guys, then you came and he.” She patted a hand on her neck. Lucifer had snapped the collars lock allowing them to remove the chain she had been tethered to. “Are you scared of Lucifer?” Alex asked, clearly surprised at the possibility. 

She took a deep breath as she looked for him once more.

Suddenly she felt as if a path folded out before her waiting, beckoning. Looking at Lucifer standing by the fountain blankly she suddenly knew, without any doubt, that he would wait there for her all day and well into the night. Well after midnight he would finally walk away, leaving the flowers on the ledge, a memorial for himself and all that he had grown into since she had known him. He would be gone out of her life as if he had never been. He would be the stone figure from Alex's nightmares hardened and alone. She could see herself too taking the girls and walking out the square, that bit of fear that was still in her propelling her out and toward Kinley who would only nurture it, whittling it to a fine point meant to lacerate and rend. 

Linda was right, Chloe had never been afraid of Heaven or Hell, God or the Devil none of that mattered and hadn't matted since the beginning. Chloe had never been afraid of Lucifer The Devil, she had run because she had loved him despite all of it and he had broken her heart so she had run before he could.

Chloe looked to both of them completely innocent and at ease with something that had sent her across the ocean. She laughed and pulled them both into a hug, hoping that it wasn’t too late to correct the bumbling way she had handled the last month. 

She had never been afraid of Lucifer, never. 

“No, I'm not.” She beamed at both of the girls. 

“I think we've rested enough, let's get going, you want to see the surprise right?” 

“Yeah!” Trixie jumped in excitement pulling Alex along; they bounced as she took their hands, moving on a path directly to Lucifer. 

Predictably Trixie spotted him first. “Lucifer!” Heads turned and were ignored. 

Confusion had Lucifer slow to respond, the crowd masking the tiny missile until the last moment as she flung herself at him. He had time to wrench his hands from his pockets, fling them in the air, avoiding the risk being trapped. 

He made an abortive reflex to return the hug as his recent habit but froze, looking up he found Chloe as she and Alex stepped out of the crowd. 

By the confusion on his face he hadn't expected her to bring the children. He kept his hands in the air, palms flat, trying to convey he wasn't a danger. Chloe smiled sadly at him, his look pleading that he meant no harm. When she shook her head, his arms only raised further in dismay. 

She rolled her eyes at him, keeping the smile in place. He frowned in turn, completely unsure of the situation. 

She looked down at Alex who had stayed close. “Let's go say hi, yeah?” Alex pressed her lips together and watched her for a moment trying to judge if Chloe meant it, if it would be ok. 

Chloe ran her hand through her hair scritching the back of her head. Alex finally smiled and nodded eagerly. “Yes please.”

They walked the last few steps to meet the confused man and the impatient child that clung to him, waiting for her hug. Chloe nudged Alex forward, the little girl latched on to his legs from the other side with a giggle as both girls locked eyes. 

Lucifer looked ill at ease and ridiculous with his hands in the air but he hasn't moved yet. He looked at the girls and then back to Chloe dubiously.

She smiled at him and reached forward resting both palms on his chest before slowly reaching up to cup his chin, her thumb rubbing across his stubble indulgently. 

His looked morphed from concerned confusion, to include stunned. She briefly wondered how she had been so stupid and closed off to have missed this hurt and longing in his eyes. it was something to address later, right now they were here and she very much wanted her friend back. 

Chloe ran her hand down his shoulder, guiding his arms to lower until she was holding one hand and could lace their fingers together. His other hand rested on Trixie's shoulder with a brief squeeze. 

“Hi.” Chloe breathed. He opened his mouth, the questions bleeding from his eyes already. 

“I'm ok. This is ok.” She stressed. 

He puffed his cheeks out as she spoke. He looked so much like Alex as he searched her face, his eyes darted back and forth until the tension evaporated from his shoulders. He brought up his hand and pushed her hair back as a breeze kicked up. 

“Hello. Chloe.” He shined when he smiled. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The square is made up, I didn't care for any of the actual ones they didn't work for me. random a/n I know.
> 
> Ok here it is, I hope everyone enjoyed the story, simple as it was. Thank you to everyone who stayed to read whether you left comments or not. 
> 
> I do want to half apologize for the sub story(Alex) when I started this, thinking it would be two small separate one shots, she wouldn't have made that much of an impact but as I mentioned the story spiraled. I do have ideas to more forward into season 4 and even less for the start of season 3 but I hate when stories are abandoned so I will make an effort.

**Author's Note:**

> Also if anyone is interested you can google: squishmallow devil, for Alex's toy.
> 
> Please forgive any spelling or grammar errors, not my strong suite, ironic when you like to tell stories, right?


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